July 4, 2012 Greetings My Friend, Did you know that our country was founded on Christian principles? Did you know that the pilgrims were escaping the persecution and wanted to come to America to worship God and live their life as Christians? This is what I learned when I went to school. My thoughts today tend toward thinking about the Holy Spirit. As I state often I did not truly meet the Holy Spirit until I started praying to Him alongside of praying to God and to Jesus. For me I had to begin a conversation with the Holy Spirit before I began to truly understand Him. My prayers generally consist of praying to each person in the Trinity and in that I begin to understand and believe and live. I understand from reading my Bible that The Holy Spirit is our helper. Jesus said that when He was gone (in heaven) that He would send a Helper. So I have felt that the Holy Spirit helps me. I see Him as a teacher as well. I generally ask for Him to teach me. I ask that He teach me to have a good attitude. I believe our attitudes can often get us in trouble. I want to have the right and a good attitude. Then I pray that The Holy Spirit teach me the love, the will and the desire of the Father for me. I ask that it be weaved into every fiber of my being so that all of me worships God and loves God and serves God. I have a strong desire to be about God in all I do, even in my thought life, even as I am Junior’s wife and then even when I am with others. Next I pray that The Holy Spirit teach me to love, to serve, to give and to share the Gospel. Then I ask that I learn how to lay it all at the Father’s feet and let Him get the glory. Me on my own, I like making life all about me. I am my favorite subject. When I learn to make everything about God I find life much more meaningful. I have more peace even in my struggles. So I have been struggling with depression and to be honest I have found the love I needed to keep on going because I love God first and foremost. Through this process I am realizing I know the Holy Spirit more than I realize. That is one of my big questions in Bible Study groups, “How do I know when I am in the Spirit?” Recently as I have sorted through the junk of my growing up years I have found myself pondering how I was saved from some junk that I did not go through as bad as my siblings did. Somewhere in the midst of all of this pondering I am realizing that I knew The Holy Spirit and did not realize it. One of the first Scripture passages I recalled was where God said that He would place His laws on our hearts. As I pondered this I realized that The Holy Spirit helps me to know right from wrong. So when I was young and was a tattle tale child God had given me an out. I also read that God will give us an out when we are faced with trials. My out was my tattle tale ways. As I pray I often see that God has laid things on my heart. I am amazed because for me I did not begin my faith journey in earnest until my 40’s. Then I see that God laid on my heart to get an education when I was going back to my ex after I had left him for a few weeks. I did get some education which allowed me to enter the work force and earn a decent living. I never finished but I had what I needed to earn a decent living and I was able to support myself when I became divorced. As I pray I often see those moments where God has always been with me. The Holy Spirit was guiding me and I had the ability to “listen” and do. I did not do it each time but many times. I am amazed how God has always been right there beside me as I struggled to do life. I guess if I was more in tune with the Holy Spirit I would have realized when I was marrying my ex and fainted and threw up at the alter that He was talking to me big time. So you see I am able to discern sometimes and not at other times. As I prayed last year through my struggles one weekend I felt God talking to me. He would show me a scene from my past and then show me what I needed to know to deal with this situation that was a struggle for me. I also prayed about going on anti-depressant medication. This medication can create some serious problems if you go off of it too sudden and I knew that and that scared me. I wasn’t sure I was a candidate for this type of drug. I finally allowed myself to go on it and so far I am doing so wonderful on it. Junior and I have a very comfortable marriage. He is my best friend outside of Jesus. I believe as I pray each day that God is leading me to be the wife Junior needs me to be. The Holy Spirit is teaching me those things I need to be for this man. One of the first things I learned is when Junior gets angry I need to be quiet and leave him alone for a bit. It is hard for me to do on my own. I want to argue my point. Junior isn’t up to my point and will be more aggravated. I have learned to leave for a while. I am quiet and then in short order we are being best friends again. The Holy Spirit is teaching me to be quiet. I can’t do it on my own. So I do know the Holy Spirit and I am walking with God and life is wonderful. May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you. Love Janet