April 7 2016

April 7 2016 Greetings My Friend, My study this morning took me to Psalm 92 and as I was reading it I saw that God was teaching me how to honor God and by doing so grow into God’s wholeness with my life. Versus 1-4 “It is good to give thanks to the Lord, to sing praises to Your name, O Most High, to declare Your steadfast love in the morning and your faithfulness by night, to the music of the lute and the harp, to the lyre. For You O Lord, have made me glad by Your work; at the the works of Your hands I sing for joy.” I learn to give thanks to God, to sing, to praise, to declare His steadfast love and His faithfulness and the musical instruments. Giving thanks has been a part of my life’s journey for some time now. I truly understand how being thankful changes me from despair to hope. Singing has helped me too. My shower time used to be my “remember how awful life is” time until God impressed upon me to sing hymns and praise songs in the shower. These songs changed my morning dread to being awake and alive. I sang for a few years each morning before stopping the songs. Cancer slowed my brain down and I showered with hope leaving the past where it belongs, in the past. Even today when despair or anxiety come I find songs floating into my thoughts. I am surprised when I start to quiet myself and I then begin to find answers to what is plaguing me. When I went to have my 2 MRI’s recently I was asked what type of music I like. I told the lady that I enjoyed Christian music and when the quietness of the machine came I heard the music. I heard the familiar music in the close quarters of the machine and I was at peace. I am anxious to find out what is going on with my body. I know the “names” of my illness’ but little more. I want to ask questions, to understand the dynamics of the disorders and someone to help me along this journey. The music taught me to let go and let God. When I left I felt peace that I am going to be okay. Each of these steps shows me God’s steadfast faithfulness. I can trust has all this under control and that He is and will keep guiding me at the right time. For the last little while I know that I know I am on the right track. It is not happening as quickly as I would like but I know in the end I will find the answers my heart is searching for. The answer may be “trust” and leave it alone or “trust” and watch the wonders as they come in the form of being with the right doctor at the right time. The last verse teaches me the gladness in my heart for the awesome way God answers prayers. They may not come out the way I first wanted but I will be good with how they do come out. I will be in awe of God and that expectation settles me even more so. I read the rest of the Psalm when I came to the last 2 verses, “They will bear fruit in old age, they are ever full of sap and green. For years I have recalled my Mother-in-law and my Grandmother. Their older years were lonely. Family did not and could not begin to fill all the loneliness that filled them, no matter how hard they tried. Reading, “They will bear fruit in old age” shows me that God will use me my whole life long and in that I know I won’t know that deep loneliness. I am lonely a lot, I miss being involved in my children’s and grandchildren’s lives but Father God diverts that energy into other ways. I am not in tears with the loneliness. I have Junior, fur children, a church family and a few good friends. I work at my health, our home, writing and reaching out to others. It is a full life and I am in awe of God’s work in my life. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet