Greetings My Friend,
Monday night's revival spoke to the church about their walk with Jesus. Some people want to mark off their life bucket list, "keep from going to hell." They may walk down the aisle" to get saved and are very serious about their salvation, for a moment anyway. the Pastor was teaching us to know if we are learning to be in a close relationship with Jesus or not. One of the first signs would be if we choose to be in church on Sunday, the Bible teaches we should meet together regularly to pray and to worship Jesus and to be in the Word. Some of the signs of your desire show up in how you live your life like do you choose to go camping instead of meeting with other believers week in and week out or do you tell yourself to stay in bed, the only day you can rest instead of desiring to be in church. The list goes on from there. Other people try to earn their way into heaven by doing "works", they overload their lives with things to volunteer for until they reach exhaustion to earn their way into heaven. Then there are the Sunday Christians that show up to church on Sunday when Monday comes they are back into the world until the next Sunday. A faith walk with Jesus is a life that is changing and cleaning of our old ways, day by day, one step at a time. The Pastor also taught that we should be reading the Bible on a consistent basis throughout the week so that we know if what is being taught is the true Word of God or feel good teaching that does not change you. My sense was that if we as followers of Jesus are actually learning and growing in our faith then the unbelievers will see and many will want what we have, the inner peace and contentment we have in our life even if we are dealing with a lot of stress. We need to be genuine in our walk, not "acting out" faith but truly allowing God to circumcise our hearts from those things of the flesh that keeps us from walking close to Him. If we who are walking with Jesus are sincere about our walk it will be noticed then imitated. Others are always watching to see if we are truly walking the walk and talking the talk of a true relationship with Jesus. The more I read the Bible, the more my spirit grows and shapes my life choices. My fleshly desires become a desire to please Jesus and to imitate His teachings. The church then won't need to have entertainment in order to spread the Gospel, it will thirst for the true Word of God. Junior and I have caught a couple of errors in preaching, mainly I could tell they knew their facts but mixed them up as they taught. That is understandable, what is not right is when Pastor's make the Word fit their own belief, agenda. If we aren't reading for ourselves God's Word then we won't know false teaching from right teaching. Lastly I hear often people say it is in the Bible, yes it is although if you are reading it you know that God is not happy with some of the practices His people were doing. I recalled a movie from the 80's I think about called "Field of Dreams". The catch phrase was "build it and they will come," my thought is if the true Word is preached, no sugar coating the Word, the people will come. A Pastor or 2 taught us that Jesus talked more about hell than He did about Heaven. This tells me that hell is just as real as heaven is real. I see that where we live in eternity is a choice entirely in our own decision, will we begin to follow Jesus fully or not? As I think on it we will decide whether we want to live in the smoking section or the non smoking part of eternity. We choose where we will live, God calls us to see the error of our ways and invites us to come to Him, again we decide if we will choose life or choose the eternal fire. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
Saturday, July 29, 2017
Thursday, July 27, 2017
July 27, 2017
Greetings My Friend,
As a follower of Jesus Christ, I realize that a time is coming where we will be judged. It is not talked about these days but God does pass judgement and execute judgement now and at the end of days. The focus of the Gospel in these days is that God is a loving God, almost like no matter what we choose whether to follow His Son with a true heart for the gift of salvation or a half hearted attempt to follow Jesus we will all be in heaven type of thinking. The Bible is clear that will not be the case. When God judges it is not a gentle smack on a hand but it is felt like a spanking on the bottom with a firm hand or worse as in the eternal fire of hell. Right now I am studying the King James Bible and I discover as I have heard for years that sometimes the different versions help us grasp what God is saying more fully. In 1 Peter I read, "For the time has come that judgement must begin at the house of God; and if it first begin at us, what shall the end be of them that obey not the gospel of God." Even believers will be judged, although if our walk is pure the blood of Jesus will cover us. The body of Christ must truly strive to be what Jesus taught us when He was among us. We need to be in one accord regardless of our denomination. We need to love each other, to share the Gospel and to reach out with the love of Christ. One way of bringing others into the fold of fellowship is to love and care for the body of Christ. This is a witness we don't often pay enough attention to. Others are watching our walk and the walk of the body of Christ as a whole. One of my new goals is to live a life that shines Jesus' heart in my life then I pray as others see this light they will say "I want what she has!" I want my life to show others I will not be defeated even in the trails of everyday life. As I deal with Parkinson's I pray that the hope I have shines in the way I live day to day with my disease. I pray that the fear of being abused has given way to confidence in overcoming my past. If I can help someone escape the wrath of hell, that one person will be a precious soul saved from God's judgement and be covered by the blood of Jesus. My faith journey has difficult moments at the same time, I am grateful to have started this journey. I see how I have grown from fearful living to fruitful living letting the light of Jesus shine in my heart. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
As a follower of Jesus Christ, I realize that a time is coming where we will be judged. It is not talked about these days but God does pass judgement and execute judgement now and at the end of days. The focus of the Gospel in these days is that God is a loving God, almost like no matter what we choose whether to follow His Son with a true heart for the gift of salvation or a half hearted attempt to follow Jesus we will all be in heaven type of thinking. The Bible is clear that will not be the case. When God judges it is not a gentle smack on a hand but it is felt like a spanking on the bottom with a firm hand or worse as in the eternal fire of hell. Right now I am studying the King James Bible and I discover as I have heard for years that sometimes the different versions help us grasp what God is saying more fully. In 1 Peter I read, "For the time has come that judgement must begin at the house of God; and if it first begin at us, what shall the end be of them that obey not the gospel of God." Even believers will be judged, although if our walk is pure the blood of Jesus will cover us. The body of Christ must truly strive to be what Jesus taught us when He was among us. We need to be in one accord regardless of our denomination. We need to love each other, to share the Gospel and to reach out with the love of Christ. One way of bringing others into the fold of fellowship is to love and care for the body of Christ. This is a witness we don't often pay enough attention to. Others are watching our walk and the walk of the body of Christ as a whole. One of my new goals is to live a life that shines Jesus' heart in my life then I pray as others see this light they will say "I want what she has!" I want my life to show others I will not be defeated even in the trails of everyday life. As I deal with Parkinson's I pray that the hope I have shines in the way I live day to day with my disease. I pray that the fear of being abused has given way to confidence in overcoming my past. If I can help someone escape the wrath of hell, that one person will be a precious soul saved from God's judgement and be covered by the blood of Jesus. My faith journey has difficult moments at the same time, I am grateful to have started this journey. I see how I have grown from fearful living to fruitful living letting the light of Jesus shine in my heart. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
Tuesday, July 25, 2017
July 25, 2017
Greetings My Friend,
"God's got this," is what my internal conversations keep reminding me as I go through all the things in life that I will do if this or that happens. Recently we went to Kingsport for Junior to see the urologist and ask why he can't urinate anymore on his own. In a few days it would be 2 months since Junior had his hernia operation and he needed the Foley bag still. We went through much the same routine we had the previous 3 weeks, the catheter came out, we hung around Kingsport for 5 hours and the first time Junior knew he needed the catheter so it was inserted again. The 2nd time though Junior found he could urinate, we were elated and went home without seeing the urologist again. The next morning Junior got up, went to the Chiropractor, took the truck in to the dealer and stopped by the grocery store. When he got home he told me he was having problems and needed a catheter put back in. He called the home health nurse, she had to get approval. Next Junior called the doctor's office and was told the nurse would call him back. When the nurse called Junior was instructed to go to the ER the next morning since he was able to manage a small stream and then the doctor would be able to authorize some tests to verify if indeed Junior's prostrate was the problem. I started wondering about details like what would I do if he needed surgery since I no longer drive, what about the fur babies the whole nine yards. I wrote my friend Debbie about the turn in events in a text message just to unload. Debbie is having a hard time in the heat and humidity with her asthma flaring real bad. Before I knew it Debbie was making arrangements to make sure I/we got Junior to the hospital, if he needed surgery had a ride home worked out and informed me that the fur babies would be taken care of. Debbie called Terrie and the 2 of them made sure we were taken care of. The church stepped up and showed us Jesus' love. I wanted to cry, laugh and fuss at these ladies. I only wanted to sort through all the stuff whirling inside my brain, to lean on a friend then get up and go to the ER the next morning. As we are going through all of this I can almost hear God tell me, "See I know your needs and I will not leave you stranded." I have known all of this but at the same time I was not sure as well. Getting old is hard work, harder when you are a childless person or you children are not near to help emotionally or physically. God reminds me though "I've got this Janet, now trust and obey." May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
"God's got this," is what my internal conversations keep reminding me as I go through all the things in life that I will do if this or that happens. Recently we went to Kingsport for Junior to see the urologist and ask why he can't urinate anymore on his own. In a few days it would be 2 months since Junior had his hernia operation and he needed the Foley bag still. We went through much the same routine we had the previous 3 weeks, the catheter came out, we hung around Kingsport for 5 hours and the first time Junior knew he needed the catheter so it was inserted again. The 2nd time though Junior found he could urinate, we were elated and went home without seeing the urologist again. The next morning Junior got up, went to the Chiropractor, took the truck in to the dealer and stopped by the grocery store. When he got home he told me he was having problems and needed a catheter put back in. He called the home health nurse, she had to get approval. Next Junior called the doctor's office and was told the nurse would call him back. When the nurse called Junior was instructed to go to the ER the next morning since he was able to manage a small stream and then the doctor would be able to authorize some tests to verify if indeed Junior's prostrate was the problem. I started wondering about details like what would I do if he needed surgery since I no longer drive, what about the fur babies the whole nine yards. I wrote my friend Debbie about the turn in events in a text message just to unload. Debbie is having a hard time in the heat and humidity with her asthma flaring real bad. Before I knew it Debbie was making arrangements to make sure I/we got Junior to the hospital, if he needed surgery had a ride home worked out and informed me that the fur babies would be taken care of. Debbie called Terrie and the 2 of them made sure we were taken care of. The church stepped up and showed us Jesus' love. I wanted to cry, laugh and fuss at these ladies. I only wanted to sort through all the stuff whirling inside my brain, to lean on a friend then get up and go to the ER the next morning. As we are going through all of this I can almost hear God tell me, "See I know your needs and I will not leave you stranded." I have known all of this but at the same time I was not sure as well. Getting old is hard work, harder when you are a childless person or you children are not near to help emotionally or physically. God reminds me though "I've got this Janet, now trust and obey." May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
Saturday, July 22, 2017
July 22, 2017
Greetings My Friend,
"Getting our church and our home in spiritual order" was the theme at the revival. The preaching style was difficult at first for me to listen to, the Pastor used the word "amen" after each word he said. I wanted to be upset but somewhere inside of me I felt I was to listen. As I let go of my irritation I started to hear a very good message. Some preaching styles are uncomfortable although this style feeds many people so is it wrong? No, it is not, those people who enjoy this style maybe equally uncomfortable with sermons that are spoken with good grammar, have a beginning, a middle and an end. As the body of Christ we need to worship Him, we need to seek souls to save not bodies to fill our churches with great entertainment. As believers we also need to get our spiritual walk outside of church going. Many of us worship on Sunday and on Monday we are living life as the world lives life, drinking, carousing, or some other sin of the flesh. We need to care for the body of Christ first because we will be known by our love, not if I am Presbyterian or Baptist, whatever denomination we belong to. Right now Junior and I cleaning out our spiritual house at home, our main focus for too long has been get the renovating done on the house we bought. In our prayers about why we can't get a contractor for the bedroom, bathroom suite is telling us we need to clean up the yard, clean off the porch and to take a Sabbath rest daily on the porch where we sit and be quiet, talk to each other. I don't know all that will come of this clean up, sit and be still lesson, I do know that God is teaching us something important. A few months ago Junior and I began a practice we did for 10 years before retirement and moving to Virginia and that is Bible study together and praying as a couple. We fell into the habit of doing these on our own as we always did but we dropped the couple time. We got out of sync with each other and our needs. Prayer is opening us to the struggles we each go through, how we can cope better and be stronger as a couple. We also undertook helping people in the community who were not willing to help themselves which left us drained and discouraged. As we have gone to prayer we find that we need to help those in need in the church first, as the church is made strong then we need to be concerned with helping the outside community. The church taking care of its own gets our house in order, our spiritual direction in the right alignment and then we can begin to win souls for Christ, not bodies to fill the pews. Many who walk down the aisle to give their lives to Christ are not returning to Christ or to church. We have to make wanting to be in a faith journey a genuine heart change moment for the duration of their lives. I am thankful for this set back with our renovating and being sent to the porch to have daily Sabbath rests. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
"Getting our church and our home in spiritual order" was the theme at the revival. The preaching style was difficult at first for me to listen to, the Pastor used the word "amen" after each word he said. I wanted to be upset but somewhere inside of me I felt I was to listen. As I let go of my irritation I started to hear a very good message. Some preaching styles are uncomfortable although this style feeds many people so is it wrong? No, it is not, those people who enjoy this style maybe equally uncomfortable with sermons that are spoken with good grammar, have a beginning, a middle and an end. As the body of Christ we need to worship Him, we need to seek souls to save not bodies to fill our churches with great entertainment. As believers we also need to get our spiritual walk outside of church going. Many of us worship on Sunday and on Monday we are living life as the world lives life, drinking, carousing, or some other sin of the flesh. We need to care for the body of Christ first because we will be known by our love, not if I am Presbyterian or Baptist, whatever denomination we belong to. Right now Junior and I cleaning out our spiritual house at home, our main focus for too long has been get the renovating done on the house we bought. In our prayers about why we can't get a contractor for the bedroom, bathroom suite is telling us we need to clean up the yard, clean off the porch and to take a Sabbath rest daily on the porch where we sit and be quiet, talk to each other. I don't know all that will come of this clean up, sit and be still lesson, I do know that God is teaching us something important. A few months ago Junior and I began a practice we did for 10 years before retirement and moving to Virginia and that is Bible study together and praying as a couple. We fell into the habit of doing these on our own as we always did but we dropped the couple time. We got out of sync with each other and our needs. Prayer is opening us to the struggles we each go through, how we can cope better and be stronger as a couple. We also undertook helping people in the community who were not willing to help themselves which left us drained and discouraged. As we have gone to prayer we find that we need to help those in need in the church first, as the church is made strong then we need to be concerned with helping the outside community. The church taking care of its own gets our house in order, our spiritual direction in the right alignment and then we can begin to win souls for Christ, not bodies to fill the pews. Many who walk down the aisle to give their lives to Christ are not returning to Christ or to church. We have to make wanting to be in a faith journey a genuine heart change moment for the duration of their lives. I am thankful for this set back with our renovating and being sent to the porch to have daily Sabbath rests. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
Thursday, July 20, 2017
July 20, 2017
Greetings My Friend,
I have been on a good sleep routine for a few weeks now, my new Parkinson's medication, chamomile tea and lavender essential oils is helping me get to sleep at night. With this more regulated wake up time Junior and I are doing our Sunday school lesson and we are in prayer most days together most days now. It is wonderful as we have been reading our Sunday school lesson we are hearing a direction from God about our home. The main work God is telling us to do is to clean up the front yard and porch which is what Junior is doing. I don't know what this has to do with the construction projects although I admit I have longed for the porch to look "homey" with less construction clutter and the yard being cleaned up is an added bonus for me. The more the yard and porch are cleaned the more I am able to move about more freely with my walker. I have few less things to trip over which entices me out the front door and off the porch for my walks. I am grateful beyond words. I don't know how this will relate to doing our bedroom if it even will but I trust God's timing. The Sunday school lesson is teaching us how Israel wound up deciding to work on their homes after they returned from captivity instead of the Temple. God tells them that is why the harvests are bare is because they are putting their own needs ahead of building the Temple. When we first moved into the house we started watching DIY and HGTV, renovating programs for homes. At first I thought I wanted a walk in closet, 2 sinks in the bathroom, a beautiful bedroom with a ton of room and deep soaking tubs with a shower next to the tub. Slowly though I realized that is not what I really wanted, I want a comfortable sized bedroom, enough room for comfortable chairs, a bathroom right off the bedroom with a deep tub and a roll in shower as we get older. I have decided I want a small closet so I don't have room to keep excess clothing and drawers in the closet to save room in the bedroom with no dresser. I want the rustic simplicity that this house was built like. We may not get the bedroom bathroom we have wanted, we may although if we don't I am okay with not getting it. God knows what our needs will be and I am learning to trust His will not my desire. The cleaning may be for us to put our priorities in order or it may be something totally different, time will tell. Learning to keep God at the center of our marriage is an ongoing lesson and I am grateful that He is teachnig us to regroup, refocus before we move forward. God also may be preparing us to move in another direction completely and this period of refocusing will help us to transition our goals and desires to align with His will. I am grateful that God is speaking to our hearts with love and with correction. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
I have been on a good sleep routine for a few weeks now, my new Parkinson's medication, chamomile tea and lavender essential oils is helping me get to sleep at night. With this more regulated wake up time Junior and I are doing our Sunday school lesson and we are in prayer most days together most days now. It is wonderful as we have been reading our Sunday school lesson we are hearing a direction from God about our home. The main work God is telling us to do is to clean up the front yard and porch which is what Junior is doing. I don't know what this has to do with the construction projects although I admit I have longed for the porch to look "homey" with less construction clutter and the yard being cleaned up is an added bonus for me. The more the yard and porch are cleaned the more I am able to move about more freely with my walker. I have few less things to trip over which entices me out the front door and off the porch for my walks. I am grateful beyond words. I don't know how this will relate to doing our bedroom if it even will but I trust God's timing. The Sunday school lesson is teaching us how Israel wound up deciding to work on their homes after they returned from captivity instead of the Temple. God tells them that is why the harvests are bare is because they are putting their own needs ahead of building the Temple. When we first moved into the house we started watching DIY and HGTV, renovating programs for homes. At first I thought I wanted a walk in closet, 2 sinks in the bathroom, a beautiful bedroom with a ton of room and deep soaking tubs with a shower next to the tub. Slowly though I realized that is not what I really wanted, I want a comfortable sized bedroom, enough room for comfortable chairs, a bathroom right off the bedroom with a deep tub and a roll in shower as we get older. I have decided I want a small closet so I don't have room to keep excess clothing and drawers in the closet to save room in the bedroom with no dresser. I want the rustic simplicity that this house was built like. We may not get the bedroom bathroom we have wanted, we may although if we don't I am okay with not getting it. God knows what our needs will be and I am learning to trust His will not my desire. The cleaning may be for us to put our priorities in order or it may be something totally different, time will tell. Learning to keep God at the center of our marriage is an ongoing lesson and I am grateful that He is teachnig us to regroup, refocus before we move forward. God also may be preparing us to move in another direction completely and this period of refocusing will help us to transition our goals and desires to align with His will. I am grateful that God is speaking to our hearts with love and with correction. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
Tuesday, July 18, 2017
July 18, 2017
Greetings My Friend,
At the revival I discovered my critical spirit as I listened to the Pastor preach and I wanted to discuss with Junior when we got home the things I felt were not Biblical, to dismiss what the Pastor taught altogether. In the midst of asking and commenting I felt a tug on my heart that told me to step back a moment. The Pastor was young, he did not have a formal Biblical education which means he is learning and growing. I was reminded about how it took me awhile to grow in the Word and how much more growing I had to do. The Bible does teach me to know God's Word so when I face trials I can rely on the Word and to discern what I am being taught. I had found some errors in the Preachers teaching and I should have had a conversation about what I have found with the Preacher not discussed how wrong he was. Through the years God has shown me that He can use poor teaching to bring someone to Him, to grow people etc. He can also teach us when our thinking is off track as well. Each of us needs to know the Word, to study the Word and allow the Holy Spirit to teach us so our faith will deepen. It will help us as we hear teaching to know the Bible and God's desires allowing us to discern if we are truly being taught God's ways. I have been guilty of taking every thing my Pastor taught as the Gospel truth, when in fact it was not. I have had Pastor's teach false things that does not line up with the Word of God and get upset when I challenge what I have read because they had the education and I do not. The best teachings I have received are from the ones who teach the Word then invite me/us to challenge them with what I have read. The ones who offer to be corrected have been the best teachers in my opinion. We can not solely rely on our Pastor's for our growth in faith, we need to read the Bible, be in prayer and I ask the Holy Spirit to open my heart to God's voice before I begin my study time. The Holy Spirit is faithful in guiding my understanding of who God is and what He desires for me in my faith journey. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
At the revival I discovered my critical spirit as I listened to the Pastor preach and I wanted to discuss with Junior when we got home the things I felt were not Biblical, to dismiss what the Pastor taught altogether. In the midst of asking and commenting I felt a tug on my heart that told me to step back a moment. The Pastor was young, he did not have a formal Biblical education which means he is learning and growing. I was reminded about how it took me awhile to grow in the Word and how much more growing I had to do. The Bible does teach me to know God's Word so when I face trials I can rely on the Word and to discern what I am being taught. I had found some errors in the Preachers teaching and I should have had a conversation about what I have found with the Preacher not discussed how wrong he was. Through the years God has shown me that He can use poor teaching to bring someone to Him, to grow people etc. He can also teach us when our thinking is off track as well. Each of us needs to know the Word, to study the Word and allow the Holy Spirit to teach us so our faith will deepen. It will help us as we hear teaching to know the Bible and God's desires allowing us to discern if we are truly being taught God's ways. I have been guilty of taking every thing my Pastor taught as the Gospel truth, when in fact it was not. I have had Pastor's teach false things that does not line up with the Word of God and get upset when I challenge what I have read because they had the education and I do not. The best teachings I have received are from the ones who teach the Word then invite me/us to challenge them with what I have read. The ones who offer to be corrected have been the best teachers in my opinion. We can not solely rely on our Pastor's for our growth in faith, we need to read the Bible, be in prayer and I ask the Holy Spirit to open my heart to God's voice before I begin my study time. The Holy Spirit is faithful in guiding my understanding of who God is and what He desires for me in my faith journey. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
Saturday, July 15, 2017
July 15, 2017
Greetings My Friend,
While doing my daily devotions I found myself wanting to look up how the Bible defines the words spirit and soul, I wanted to write some of what I found down but my journal notebook did not seem the place to keep putting my findings in. The journal eventually gets full then filed away which means my findings are somewhere not quickly gotten to. I decided it was time to buy a folder and some loose leaf paper to put in the folder. Now I can jot down my findings and keep the notebook near where I do my daily devotions. While I was out one day this week I picked up a pink folder and loose leaf paper and now I am ready to keep a notebook of my findings. I have talked about this a few times and for some reason I did not pick up the folder. I will begin a new journey in my study time in the Word. Junior finally got a printer hooked up and running so now I also am able to copy pictures and even maps to add to my notebook. I love the student sensation I have as I study the Word. Junior and I have been listening to an audio book called "Switch on Your brain". I love what I am learning as I listen to this scientist's findings about our brain. She used the Bible as she did her research so as she teaches us about our brain she also shows how God's Word lines up with her scientific findings. My PCP recommended this book when I was getting fretful about my and Junior's disability and how we were going to manage. She has been great at teaching me to focus on one thing at a time. As she focused on one of my health issues at a time in short order I was once more able to function more fully again. My last visit to my PCP she told me that there is a good possibility that my Parkinson's may not progress beyond where I am at this point which is early in the disease process. From what this audio book is teaching me there is a good possibility I can heal my brain with the positive thinking and focused thinking process to the point I may not get worse with my disease. I have been told by other PD patients that exercise and a healthy diet could prolong each stage of my disease for many years and I am doing this as well. I am studying the Word, about my disease which gives me very little time to brood about where my disease will take me. I am accepting the fact that I need a 2 hour nap each day and I have gotten fairly good at not allowing myself to be guilt tripped into joining activities I don't have the energy for just to make others happy. My evening walks give me peace of mind and I can feel my muscles firming up. Studying God's Word challenges my mind allowing me to further study how to be proactive with my disease. My main source of social contact is church and shopping which is enough for the most part. Debbie and Boogie fill the girlfriend need when we visit with them. I have learned how to manage my muscle pain due to them tightening up with exercises and magnesium oil. The more I research the more my brain expands and of late I find I am not having as much brain fog as I had been. If my disease progress' I accept that as well. When I had cancer I came to terms with dying because if I died I would be in heaven with Jesus and if I did not it means God has work for me to do no matter how disabled I am. Knowing that God can use me gives me a hope which drives me. God will provide the help I will need to live and when the fears try to overcome me I ask God to help my unbelief. The more I do this the more I see God's hand taking my fears and replacing trust in my heart. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
While doing my daily devotions I found myself wanting to look up how the Bible defines the words spirit and soul, I wanted to write some of what I found down but my journal notebook did not seem the place to keep putting my findings in. The journal eventually gets full then filed away which means my findings are somewhere not quickly gotten to. I decided it was time to buy a folder and some loose leaf paper to put in the folder. Now I can jot down my findings and keep the notebook near where I do my daily devotions. While I was out one day this week I picked up a pink folder and loose leaf paper and now I am ready to keep a notebook of my findings. I have talked about this a few times and for some reason I did not pick up the folder. I will begin a new journey in my study time in the Word. Junior finally got a printer hooked up and running so now I also am able to copy pictures and even maps to add to my notebook. I love the student sensation I have as I study the Word. Junior and I have been listening to an audio book called "Switch on Your brain". I love what I am learning as I listen to this scientist's findings about our brain. She used the Bible as she did her research so as she teaches us about our brain she also shows how God's Word lines up with her scientific findings. My PCP recommended this book when I was getting fretful about my and Junior's disability and how we were going to manage. She has been great at teaching me to focus on one thing at a time. As she focused on one of my health issues at a time in short order I was once more able to function more fully again. My last visit to my PCP she told me that there is a good possibility that my Parkinson's may not progress beyond where I am at this point which is early in the disease process. From what this audio book is teaching me there is a good possibility I can heal my brain with the positive thinking and focused thinking process to the point I may not get worse with my disease. I have been told by other PD patients that exercise and a healthy diet could prolong each stage of my disease for many years and I am doing this as well. I am studying the Word, about my disease which gives me very little time to brood about where my disease will take me. I am accepting the fact that I need a 2 hour nap each day and I have gotten fairly good at not allowing myself to be guilt tripped into joining activities I don't have the energy for just to make others happy. My evening walks give me peace of mind and I can feel my muscles firming up. Studying God's Word challenges my mind allowing me to further study how to be proactive with my disease. My main source of social contact is church and shopping which is enough for the most part. Debbie and Boogie fill the girlfriend need when we visit with them. I have learned how to manage my muscle pain due to them tightening up with exercises and magnesium oil. The more I research the more my brain expands and of late I find I am not having as much brain fog as I had been. If my disease progress' I accept that as well. When I had cancer I came to terms with dying because if I died I would be in heaven with Jesus and if I did not it means God has work for me to do no matter how disabled I am. Knowing that God can use me gives me a hope which drives me. God will provide the help I will need to live and when the fears try to overcome me I ask God to help my unbelief. The more I do this the more I see God's hand taking my fears and replacing trust in my heart. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
Thursday, July 13, 2017
July 13, 2017
Greetings My Friend,
The churches in Clintwood are having a revival, the old fashioned kind outside with singing and preaching. I have never been to one of these revivals so I went full of curiosity. The first night there was a potluck where all the churches gathered to share a meal. When the Pastor got up to preach he talked about how we all came together in love, like it will be in heaven, not just one denomination but unified in Christ, this stuck in my heart. The singer and the band had that country sound with some of the long drawn out sounds and twangs I find I love. It is beautiful in its simplicity. The Preacher had that dramatic style that to me sounds like an urgency in his voice and reminding us of the need for Jesus. As a Christian we long for the return of Jesus and the Preacher urged us to make a decision and soon. We don't know the day or the hour of Jesus' return, we know though that it will come and we long for His return. While we wait for His return we also need to do our best to follow Jesus' commission to us as He rose into heaven " Therefore go and make disciple of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit." What I learned again was how it is important it is to bring the Good News of Jesus to those I meet and those that had not given their life to Jesus, now was the time. I hear it in the KJV as I read about God's testimony, this word testimony tis an encouragement. God tells His story to us in the Bible, I tell others what God has done in my life since I accepted the gift of Jesus and repented of my sins. My story often encourages another person and opens their eyes to the gift of Jesus in their life. People can hear all of the hell fire and damnation speeches that abound but more often it is the simple sharing of how Jesus has worked in my life that opens their hearts to His saving grace. Pastor Joe tells his story a lot while he gives the sermon when I hear how a child of an alcoholic father who was shunned became a man of substance and integrity I learn that I matter to God with my own crazy childhood and adult life. When I have this kind of hope I want to share it with others, God gives me my unique ways of sharing, for me it is writing, telling about how God has helped me overcome abuse, cancer, wayward children and so many other things. Today God teaches me how to live with a broken body and how to accept it, to be content in it and to learn the lessons of being in this brokenness. My greatest need is to be wanted and useful so God shows me that I have many things to do for His kingdom building. I am anxious to see what the other nights of the revival will be like, we will go as long as our energy holds out and stay as long as my muscles allow me to and when they tighten up, we will leave. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet.
The churches in Clintwood are having a revival, the old fashioned kind outside with singing and preaching. I have never been to one of these revivals so I went full of curiosity. The first night there was a potluck where all the churches gathered to share a meal. When the Pastor got up to preach he talked about how we all came together in love, like it will be in heaven, not just one denomination but unified in Christ, this stuck in my heart. The singer and the band had that country sound with some of the long drawn out sounds and twangs I find I love. It is beautiful in its simplicity. The Preacher had that dramatic style that to me sounds like an urgency in his voice and reminding us of the need for Jesus. As a Christian we long for the return of Jesus and the Preacher urged us to make a decision and soon. We don't know the day or the hour of Jesus' return, we know though that it will come and we long for His return. While we wait for His return we also need to do our best to follow Jesus' commission to us as He rose into heaven " Therefore go and make disciple of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit." What I learned again was how it is important it is to bring the Good News of Jesus to those I meet and those that had not given their life to Jesus, now was the time. I hear it in the KJV as I read about God's testimony, this word testimony tis an encouragement. God tells His story to us in the Bible, I tell others what God has done in my life since I accepted the gift of Jesus and repented of my sins. My story often encourages another person and opens their eyes to the gift of Jesus in their life. People can hear all of the hell fire and damnation speeches that abound but more often it is the simple sharing of how Jesus has worked in my life that opens their hearts to His saving grace. Pastor Joe tells his story a lot while he gives the sermon when I hear how a child of an alcoholic father who was shunned became a man of substance and integrity I learn that I matter to God with my own crazy childhood and adult life. When I have this kind of hope I want to share it with others, God gives me my unique ways of sharing, for me it is writing, telling about how God has helped me overcome abuse, cancer, wayward children and so many other things. Today God teaches me how to live with a broken body and how to accept it, to be content in it and to learn the lessons of being in this brokenness. My greatest need is to be wanted and useful so God shows me that I have many things to do for His kingdom building. I am anxious to see what the other nights of the revival will be like, we will go as long as our energy holds out and stay as long as my muscles allow me to and when they tighten up, we will leave. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet.
Tuesday, July 11, 2017
July 11, 2017
Greetings My Friend
I have a huge need to be noticed and accepted, I want to be pleasing and to be loved so much I will do things just to get the attention I desire. I started being an attention seeking person with silliness and progressed from there, I wanted to be an only child so I decided to go to the neighbors who had no children offering them one of my siblings so that all 3 of us could be an only child getting all kinds of attention. It sounded logical to my young mind at the time. Ask me today which child even which pet to get rid of and I could not do it. King Saul was more interested in what the people in his kingdom thought than on what God had instructed him to do. God wanted him to destroy all the people, their animals, homes, everything. King Saul saved the king of that country, saved the choicest cattle instead of doing what God wanted him to do. God sent Samuel to tell him "Hath the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold to obey is better than sacrifice, and to hearken than the fat of rams." I know that there also has been times where I thought I was obeying God's Word by giving a tenth of all that I made to the Lord. The problem was I felt justified with this offering and felt that because of my righteous (in my thinking) gift the church would have to help me meet my need if I was in need. I thought I gave from my heart but I was truly giving from a need to be accepted and noticed. God has rearranged the way we give at this moment, what goes into the offering plate is cash with no envelope to credit our account. We give elsewhere as well again with no record made. To be honest this type of giving has shown me that God works in my life and only He knows the amount of our gifts. God also has been working with me to give of my time not in the church setting but in less than noticeable ways. He shows me there is plenty of work for His kingdom building besides out in the open where I can get accolades and be noticed. This week our Sunday school lesson has been teaching us how important it is to teach others to work with us then to let them go into the work God has called them to do while we step back. Again this is hard because we enjoy the accolades so much we don't want to let go of what God brought us to at one time. God has been showing me to allow the younger people learn within the church setting and has sent me outside of the church building to reach out into the community more directly. The Apostle Paul worked beside Barnabas then Barnabas sent Paul out into ministry. Paul had young people who worked beside him like Timothy, Silas and Luke. He trained them then sent them out. Once they went out into their own ministry field Paul continued to do the work he was called to do, often in prison reaching out to the guards and those who watched over him. When Paul's time was nearing an end, he encouraged the younger people to continue on in ministry telling them to imitate what they saw him doing. The younger people taught others and so it went with the Word of God still being preached and taught today. God wants our heart, our willing minds and hands not just our money or empty words. The more behind the scenes I have gotten, the more I love the gift of my salvation our Lord Jesus. I have plenty of work to do in my older years and feel useful even in my broken body. God brings me a wholeness of life that quiets my fears. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
I have a huge need to be noticed and accepted, I want to be pleasing and to be loved so much I will do things just to get the attention I desire. I started being an attention seeking person with silliness and progressed from there, I wanted to be an only child so I decided to go to the neighbors who had no children offering them one of my siblings so that all 3 of us could be an only child getting all kinds of attention. It sounded logical to my young mind at the time. Ask me today which child even which pet to get rid of and I could not do it. King Saul was more interested in what the people in his kingdom thought than on what God had instructed him to do. God wanted him to destroy all the people, their animals, homes, everything. King Saul saved the king of that country, saved the choicest cattle instead of doing what God wanted him to do. God sent Samuel to tell him "Hath the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold to obey is better than sacrifice, and to hearken than the fat of rams." I know that there also has been times where I thought I was obeying God's Word by giving a tenth of all that I made to the Lord. The problem was I felt justified with this offering and felt that because of my righteous (in my thinking) gift the church would have to help me meet my need if I was in need. I thought I gave from my heart but I was truly giving from a need to be accepted and noticed. God has rearranged the way we give at this moment, what goes into the offering plate is cash with no envelope to credit our account. We give elsewhere as well again with no record made. To be honest this type of giving has shown me that God works in my life and only He knows the amount of our gifts. God also has been working with me to give of my time not in the church setting but in less than noticeable ways. He shows me there is plenty of work for His kingdom building besides out in the open where I can get accolades and be noticed. This week our Sunday school lesson has been teaching us how important it is to teach others to work with us then to let them go into the work God has called them to do while we step back. Again this is hard because we enjoy the accolades so much we don't want to let go of what God brought us to at one time. God has been showing me to allow the younger people learn within the church setting and has sent me outside of the church building to reach out into the community more directly. The Apostle Paul worked beside Barnabas then Barnabas sent Paul out into ministry. Paul had young people who worked beside him like Timothy, Silas and Luke. He trained them then sent them out. Once they went out into their own ministry field Paul continued to do the work he was called to do, often in prison reaching out to the guards and those who watched over him. When Paul's time was nearing an end, he encouraged the younger people to continue on in ministry telling them to imitate what they saw him doing. The younger people taught others and so it went with the Word of God still being preached and taught today. God wants our heart, our willing minds and hands not just our money or empty words. The more behind the scenes I have gotten, the more I love the gift of my salvation our Lord Jesus. I have plenty of work to do in my older years and feel useful even in my broken body. God brings me a wholeness of life that quiets my fears. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
Saturday, July 8, 2017
July 8, 2017
Greetings My Friend,
Junior and I are both handicapped, making life a bit of a challenge for us at times. Right now Junior's thumb is in an ace bandage because he jammed his thumb, this becomes a problem when he needs to pull my walker out of the back of the pick up truck. Junior's hips have started hurting him so he has started using a walking stick as we attempt to get out of the truck, I pull the walking stick up front with me while Junior gets my walker. When Junior brings the walker around, I hand him the walking stick. Once we are out of the truck and moving we present a sight as we amble along side by side me with the walker, Junior and his walking stick and his banged up thumb wrapped up in an ace bandage adds to the scene's ambiance. I am able to rub magnesium oil on his hips and neck and he helps me get my walker out and I love my life with the man of my dreams beside me. As I chatted on line the other day with a disabled friend I realized that Junior and I have been too accepting of what the doctor's are telling him in regards to his needing a Foley bag. We want to be agreeable but there is a point that people begin walking all over us. He should have never been released after surgery until he urinated. The nurse should have put the catheter in Junior and left it or had him admitted. No one is taking the time to figure out why when he went in for surgery he could urinate fine and afterward he can't. The home health nurse was very concerned that Junior has blood in his urine still and suggested that we insist on some answers. When an online friend suggested that it was time to get rather insistent not letting the doctor's give us flimsy excuses it dawned on me that the old fighter that I once was has gone way to soft. We need to start talking to God about our problem then allow Him to direct our steps. I know too well that we need to be firm and insist on some answers and God will guide me if I keep this problem in His hands. Sometimes it is easy to roll along not allowing my mind to think about the problem, this is one time I need to step up to the plate and ask God to fight my battle for me, giving me words and interceding for both Junior and I. I continue to learn that God wants to be in the details, this time I need to realize that the detail is Junior's bladder worked fine before hernia surgery and 6 weeks later it does not. I can't assume God's got this when I don't ask Him if He does or not. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
Junior and I are both handicapped, making life a bit of a challenge for us at times. Right now Junior's thumb is in an ace bandage because he jammed his thumb, this becomes a problem when he needs to pull my walker out of the back of the pick up truck. Junior's hips have started hurting him so he has started using a walking stick as we attempt to get out of the truck, I pull the walking stick up front with me while Junior gets my walker. When Junior brings the walker around, I hand him the walking stick. Once we are out of the truck and moving we present a sight as we amble along side by side me with the walker, Junior and his walking stick and his banged up thumb wrapped up in an ace bandage adds to the scene's ambiance. I am able to rub magnesium oil on his hips and neck and he helps me get my walker out and I love my life with the man of my dreams beside me. As I chatted on line the other day with a disabled friend I realized that Junior and I have been too accepting of what the doctor's are telling him in regards to his needing a Foley bag. We want to be agreeable but there is a point that people begin walking all over us. He should have never been released after surgery until he urinated. The nurse should have put the catheter in Junior and left it or had him admitted. No one is taking the time to figure out why when he went in for surgery he could urinate fine and afterward he can't. The home health nurse was very concerned that Junior has blood in his urine still and suggested that we insist on some answers. When an online friend suggested that it was time to get rather insistent not letting the doctor's give us flimsy excuses it dawned on me that the old fighter that I once was has gone way to soft. We need to start talking to God about our problem then allow Him to direct our steps. I know too well that we need to be firm and insist on some answers and God will guide me if I keep this problem in His hands. Sometimes it is easy to roll along not allowing my mind to think about the problem, this is one time I need to step up to the plate and ask God to fight my battle for me, giving me words and interceding for both Junior and I. I continue to learn that God wants to be in the details, this time I need to realize that the detail is Junior's bladder worked fine before hernia surgery and 6 weeks later it does not. I can't assume God's got this when I don't ask Him if He does or not. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
Thursday, July 6, 2017
July 6, 2017
Greetings My Friend,
I have to admit I had a tiny bit of understanding in regards to Sabbath rest. It made sense and I felt that overall Sunday was my day to attend church, bring my focus back to God and then do whatever else came to mind, mainly take care of a family when my children were young, visit grandparents and volunteer with the youth at church. When I married Junior we went to Sunday school and services, had lunch many weeks with friends from church, napped and then went back to church for a few years. After cancer though I started slowing down and Sunday afternoon and evenings were for long naps. Here in Virginia we have been going to Sunday school, services, nap all afternoon and then return for Bible study, I love my Sundays. As my disease was getting worse before I had a diagnosis and medication we stopped evening Bible study. Now that I have medication that helps me return to a some of the energy I had we attend evening Bible study again. Both Junior and I sleep a few hours before we go back. For the past week or so I have found a better time to walk, which is in the evenings. Since the raspberries are ripe I pick them in place of a walk, it is relaxing. When I am finished, I sit on the porch for an hour, sometimes more, sometimes less and I feel myself taking in the awe of God's creation. We don't see deer or rabbits, or even squirrels because of the dogs but the greenery is astounding, the sky is beautiful. I am relaxing in ways I have never known before. After we had evening Bible study on Sunday they had a tribute for the veterans at the Methodist church so Junior and I attended the program, enjoyed the music and poems that were read. By the end of the service my back was freezing up so we did not stay for ice cream, which we don't eat due to allergies. When we got home, I grabbed a bite to eat and headed out to do some raspberry picking. Daisy got brave when I let her out of my walker, she explored the back yard. Junior came along for the picking too, he did a lot of trimming of the blackberry bushes. When we finished we sat on the porch for a good long while talking, watching the night sky appear with the dogs all around us sleeping on the porch, even the cats pulled up a piece of the porch. In the midst of all of this I started to understand what a Sabbath rest is. Sabbath rest on Sunday is important to focus on God, Jesus and His gift of salvation and the Holy Spirit's promptings in my heart. God rested on the 7th day from His labor setting the example for us later He taught us in the 10 commandments to rest on the Sabbath. It came to me that taking small Sabbath rests during the week is important as well. Since moving to the mountains and the forests though I find that my spirit has had a chance to let go of some of the junk that resided in me. Some people use the morning wake up with coffee time to connect with their soul, make plans for the day etc. Allergies and asthma keep me inside in the mornings. I do devotions first thing and love that very much, I study the Word, look up meanings of words, check out the maps and enjoy this time to dig deeply into the Word. For the past week or so though I have discovered nightly time reflecting on my day, the lessons, the beauty that surround me and in all of this I am quieter, calmer. I believe I have discovered a mini Sabbath rest a time of absorbing God's hand in and on my life. I have used the TV since retirement to entice me to work, to stop and rest. I taught myself to work when commercials came on, soon I had enough energy to be on my feet for an hour or more. Next I started waiting to turn the TV on at the end of my day, many times I dozed off to sleep. With this last medication increase, I am able to take an afternoon nap, do work before and after then I rest in my walk/raspberry picking and porch sitting. God has given me these to help me and now He invites me to view the beauty He has created. This summer the porch has been clear of major construction tools, I am able to move about it without tripping and life is awesome. I am growing old with Junior in a house God sent us to and we are resting our spirit's in God's loving arms.May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
I have to admit I had a tiny bit of understanding in regards to Sabbath rest. It made sense and I felt that overall Sunday was my day to attend church, bring my focus back to God and then do whatever else came to mind, mainly take care of a family when my children were young, visit grandparents and volunteer with the youth at church. When I married Junior we went to Sunday school and services, had lunch many weeks with friends from church, napped and then went back to church for a few years. After cancer though I started slowing down and Sunday afternoon and evenings were for long naps. Here in Virginia we have been going to Sunday school, services, nap all afternoon and then return for Bible study, I love my Sundays. As my disease was getting worse before I had a diagnosis and medication we stopped evening Bible study. Now that I have medication that helps me return to a some of the energy I had we attend evening Bible study again. Both Junior and I sleep a few hours before we go back. For the past week or so I have found a better time to walk, which is in the evenings. Since the raspberries are ripe I pick them in place of a walk, it is relaxing. When I am finished, I sit on the porch for an hour, sometimes more, sometimes less and I feel myself taking in the awe of God's creation. We don't see deer or rabbits, or even squirrels because of the dogs but the greenery is astounding, the sky is beautiful. I am relaxing in ways I have never known before. After we had evening Bible study on Sunday they had a tribute for the veterans at the Methodist church so Junior and I attended the program, enjoyed the music and poems that were read. By the end of the service my back was freezing up so we did not stay for ice cream, which we don't eat due to allergies. When we got home, I grabbed a bite to eat and headed out to do some raspberry picking. Daisy got brave when I let her out of my walker, she explored the back yard. Junior came along for the picking too, he did a lot of trimming of the blackberry bushes. When we finished we sat on the porch for a good long while talking, watching the night sky appear with the dogs all around us sleeping on the porch, even the cats pulled up a piece of the porch. In the midst of all of this I started to understand what a Sabbath rest is. Sabbath rest on Sunday is important to focus on God, Jesus and His gift of salvation and the Holy Spirit's promptings in my heart. God rested on the 7th day from His labor setting the example for us later He taught us in the 10 commandments to rest on the Sabbath. It came to me that taking small Sabbath rests during the week is important as well. Since moving to the mountains and the forests though I find that my spirit has had a chance to let go of some of the junk that resided in me. Some people use the morning wake up with coffee time to connect with their soul, make plans for the day etc. Allergies and asthma keep me inside in the mornings. I do devotions first thing and love that very much, I study the Word, look up meanings of words, check out the maps and enjoy this time to dig deeply into the Word. For the past week or so though I have discovered nightly time reflecting on my day, the lessons, the beauty that surround me and in all of this I am quieter, calmer. I believe I have discovered a mini Sabbath rest a time of absorbing God's hand in and on my life. I have used the TV since retirement to entice me to work, to stop and rest. I taught myself to work when commercials came on, soon I had enough energy to be on my feet for an hour or more. Next I started waiting to turn the TV on at the end of my day, many times I dozed off to sleep. With this last medication increase, I am able to take an afternoon nap, do work before and after then I rest in my walk/raspberry picking and porch sitting. God has given me these to help me and now He invites me to view the beauty He has created. This summer the porch has been clear of major construction tools, I am able to move about it without tripping and life is awesome. I am growing old with Junior in a house God sent us to and we are resting our spirit's in God's loving arms.May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
Tuesday, July 4, 2017
July 4, 2017
Greetings My Friend,
As the warm water from the shower beats down on my neck I am amazed at how tight it is. I did not know my shoulders were hunched up and so are so tight and the warmth of the shower makes me want to lower my shoulders to a more relaxed state. The other area that tightens up on me is my lower back, which is why I find it difficult to stand for very long, walk on my own steam very far. My Parkinson's seems to settle mostly in those 2 areas the most although I get muscles spasms when I am tired, my toes cramp up from time to time or the calves of my legs tighten up on me to the point of a muscle cramp. I also deal with tremors in my hands although the medication I take keeps them at bay. I have noticed I need the afternoon nap due to my lower back being stressed which tires me greatly. During the hot summer months my back brace makes me too hot so I only use a shoulder brace to help straighten my shoulders. My theory is if I keep pulling my posture back into alignment then I will be able to walk longer avoiding the trips and falls that my disease is prone to. Having osteoporosis I am vigilant in keeping myself from falling, thus breaking bones. I have been on the stronger dose of my PD medication for about 2 months now and I am finding that I am getting stronger, I have more energy to do things like exercise more which is finding me wandering about our property more so. With the porch cleared off of construction debris and tools I am able to enjoy the quiet time of porch sitting and this is the first year I have been able to enjoy fully where God has placed us. I was not confident walking around in the yard while using my walking stick, with all the uneven grass, holes and what not. I do find though that the walker gives me more confidence and I have been enjoying our yard so much more so. With the summer heat my stiffness is more tolerable which gives me confidence too. After my wanderings around the yard it is fun to watch the night sky consume the daylight and I am able to enjoy the fireflies as they light up the darkness of night. I feel that God has given me a reprieve in my illness and I feel so blessed. As I absorb His creation I find my spirit is quieted, that God is teaching me to be still and know that He is God. I learn that PD is what I have although God also tells me that I am not alone on this often scary journey. With this reprieve I feel that I may be stable in PD for many years and because of PD I am able to see the blessing God is giving me. I am more comfortable with "be still and know that God is God." As summer will turn to fall, fall to winter I will have these precious moments to recall in my difficult moments of this disease and in life in general. I am grateful for the reawakening in my soul May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
As the warm water from the shower beats down on my neck I am amazed at how tight it is. I did not know my shoulders were hunched up and so are so tight and the warmth of the shower makes me want to lower my shoulders to a more relaxed state. The other area that tightens up on me is my lower back, which is why I find it difficult to stand for very long, walk on my own steam very far. My Parkinson's seems to settle mostly in those 2 areas the most although I get muscles spasms when I am tired, my toes cramp up from time to time or the calves of my legs tighten up on me to the point of a muscle cramp. I also deal with tremors in my hands although the medication I take keeps them at bay. I have noticed I need the afternoon nap due to my lower back being stressed which tires me greatly. During the hot summer months my back brace makes me too hot so I only use a shoulder brace to help straighten my shoulders. My theory is if I keep pulling my posture back into alignment then I will be able to walk longer avoiding the trips and falls that my disease is prone to. Having osteoporosis I am vigilant in keeping myself from falling, thus breaking bones. I have been on the stronger dose of my PD medication for about 2 months now and I am finding that I am getting stronger, I have more energy to do things like exercise more which is finding me wandering about our property more so. With the porch cleared off of construction debris and tools I am able to enjoy the quiet time of porch sitting and this is the first year I have been able to enjoy fully where God has placed us. I was not confident walking around in the yard while using my walking stick, with all the uneven grass, holes and what not. I do find though that the walker gives me more confidence and I have been enjoying our yard so much more so. With the summer heat my stiffness is more tolerable which gives me confidence too. After my wanderings around the yard it is fun to watch the night sky consume the daylight and I am able to enjoy the fireflies as they light up the darkness of night. I feel that God has given me a reprieve in my illness and I feel so blessed. As I absorb His creation I find my spirit is quieted, that God is teaching me to be still and know that He is God. I learn that PD is what I have although God also tells me that I am not alone on this often scary journey. With this reprieve I feel that I may be stable in PD for many years and because of PD I am able to see the blessing God is giving me. I am more comfortable with "be still and know that God is God." As summer will turn to fall, fall to winter I will have these precious moments to recall in my difficult moments of this disease and in life in general. I am grateful for the reawakening in my soul May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
Saturday, July 1, 2017
July 1, 2017
Greetings My Friend,
I am a person who has struggled with depression and anxiety throughout my life. Depression can consume you until all you see and feel is a deep blackness in a hole so wide you begin to think you will never ever come out of it. Having been abused was more than likely where my depression began and I learned how to be a victim instead of fighting to get away from the abuse. As a child I figured all families went through what our family did. I have worked extremely hard to walk away from depression throughout my lifetime by reading all kinds of self-help books and going into counseling. I made the biggest leap toward gaining strong mental health after my divorce when I gave my life over to Jesus. I also stayed in counseling after the divorce that my ex and I had started prior to the marriage ending. I had a wonderful older gentleman for a counselor who was Christian and He started teaching me how to give my fears over to Jesus. My doctor has helped me find many of my health issues which has also helped my mental health along with giving me medication to help quiet my depression and anxiety. I was anxious when my health kept declining until my doctor and I got me back on stable ground for the most part. The last struggle was my gait issues which kept getting worse for 5-6 years until I was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. The medication has helped my gait issues tremendously, I was needing a wheelchair to get around when we went out, today I use a walker. I am struggling with a support group that seems depressed about their disease to the point of anger because they feel their life has been cut short. I have mourned my loss of energy, stable walking and all the other things associated with PD. Through it all God showed me my life is not over, that He has work for me to do and He has shown me my life can be full and rich even though I shake, walk off in a strange direction, trip and fall. Medication has quieted the tremors, the spasms and other symptoms as well. I have learned to sew, to keep house in a broken body, to write and so much more. I still have fears of how Junior and I will take care of ourselves since we are both disabled and somehow I know God will take care of this need as well. I am sad to see other PD patients struggling and angry because a cure is not coming quick enough. I find myself pulling away because I sense this group does not know what hope is and when I offer the hope I have in Jesus, I sense they are not interested in hope. We can bemoan what is wrong with us or we can find how to live with what we have and enjoy our lives. If I can't live in hope, I will fall back into that dark hole so I will celebrate what I am able to do each stage of my disease knowing that God's got this. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
I am a person who has struggled with depression and anxiety throughout my life. Depression can consume you until all you see and feel is a deep blackness in a hole so wide you begin to think you will never ever come out of it. Having been abused was more than likely where my depression began and I learned how to be a victim instead of fighting to get away from the abuse. As a child I figured all families went through what our family did. I have worked extremely hard to walk away from depression throughout my lifetime by reading all kinds of self-help books and going into counseling. I made the biggest leap toward gaining strong mental health after my divorce when I gave my life over to Jesus. I also stayed in counseling after the divorce that my ex and I had started prior to the marriage ending. I had a wonderful older gentleman for a counselor who was Christian and He started teaching me how to give my fears over to Jesus. My doctor has helped me find many of my health issues which has also helped my mental health along with giving me medication to help quiet my depression and anxiety. I was anxious when my health kept declining until my doctor and I got me back on stable ground for the most part. The last struggle was my gait issues which kept getting worse for 5-6 years until I was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. The medication has helped my gait issues tremendously, I was needing a wheelchair to get around when we went out, today I use a walker. I am struggling with a support group that seems depressed about their disease to the point of anger because they feel their life has been cut short. I have mourned my loss of energy, stable walking and all the other things associated with PD. Through it all God showed me my life is not over, that He has work for me to do and He has shown me my life can be full and rich even though I shake, walk off in a strange direction, trip and fall. Medication has quieted the tremors, the spasms and other symptoms as well. I have learned to sew, to keep house in a broken body, to write and so much more. I still have fears of how Junior and I will take care of ourselves since we are both disabled and somehow I know God will take care of this need as well. I am sad to see other PD patients struggling and angry because a cure is not coming quick enough. I find myself pulling away because I sense this group does not know what hope is and when I offer the hope I have in Jesus, I sense they are not interested in hope. We can bemoan what is wrong with us or we can find how to live with what we have and enjoy our lives. If I can't live in hope, I will fall back into that dark hole so I will celebrate what I am able to do each stage of my disease knowing that God's got this. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet
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