July 11, 2017

Greetings My Friend

I have a huge need to be noticed and accepted, I want to be pleasing and to be loved so much I will do things just to get the attention I desire. I started being an attention seeking person with silliness and progressed from there, I wanted to be an only child so I decided to go to the neighbors who had no children offering them one of my siblings so that all 3 of us could be an only child getting all kinds of attention. It sounded logical to my young mind at the time. Ask me today which child even which pet to get rid of and I could not do it. King Saul was more interested in what the people in his kingdom thought than on what God had instructed him to do. God wanted him to destroy all the people, their animals, homes, everything. King Saul saved the king of that country, saved the choicest cattle instead of doing what God wanted him to do. God sent Samuel to tell him "Hath the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold to obey is better than sacrifice, and to hearken than the fat of rams." I know that there also has been times where I thought I was obeying God's Word by giving a tenth of all that I made to the Lord. The problem was I felt justified with this offering and felt that because of my righteous (in my thinking) gift the church would have to help me meet my need if I was in need. I thought I gave from my heart but I was truly giving from a need to be accepted and noticed. God has rearranged the way we give at this moment, what goes into the offering plate is cash with no envelope to credit our account. We give elsewhere as well again with no record made. To be honest this type of giving has shown me that God works in my life and only He knows the amount of our gifts. God also has been working with me to give of my time not in the church setting but in less than noticeable ways. He shows me there is plenty of work for His kingdom building besides out in the open where I can get accolades and be noticed. This week our Sunday school lesson has been teaching us how important it is to teach others to work with us then to let them go into the work God has called them to do while we step back. Again this is hard because we enjoy the accolades so much we don't want to let go of what God brought us to at one time. God has been showing me to allow the younger people learn within the church setting and has sent me outside of the church building to reach out into the community more directly. The Apostle Paul worked beside Barnabas then Barnabas sent Paul out into ministry. Paul had young people who worked beside him like Timothy, Silas and Luke. He trained them then sent them out. Once they went out into their own ministry field Paul continued to do the work he was called to do, often in prison reaching out to the guards and those who watched over him. When Paul's time was nearing an end, he encouraged the younger people to continue on in ministry telling them to imitate what they saw him doing. The younger people taught others and so it went with the Word of God still being preached and taught today. God wants our heart, our willing minds and hands not just our money or empty words. The more behind the scenes I have gotten, the more I love the gift of my salvation our Lord Jesus. I have plenty of work to do in my older years and feel useful even in my broken body. God brings me a wholeness of life that quiets my fears. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet