December 17 2015

December 17 2015 Greetings My Friend I walk through the house and I see the shine on our wood floors. We wanted to finish our floors right off and were told it is best to do them last. We were keeping them clean but with the house being 90 some years old and all the people who were “rent to own” and never did stay the house fell into disrepair including the floors. The polish had worn off years ago and a few floors were down to the original wood. One day we had the idea of waxing these floors at least there would be some protection on them we thought. The floors have been kept clean but looked dingy soon with the wax the floors did not look so dingy. Several coats of wax the floors started to shine and we started to see the original color of the stain that was used back when they were new. Recently Junior and I were talking about how to build the kitchen as to where to place the things in it. Later I walked out on the front porch and had that familiar sight of clutter that takes me over the edge. I had not seen Junior inside working on the kitchen very much in recent weeks and felt this project was side tracked again. The clutter both on the porch and the kitchen overwhelmed me and irritation was rising within me. When I mentioned the porch Junior started talking in a manner I have not heard in awhile. He was telling me that he is indeed working on the kitchen by not being in the kitchen. I understood when he was insulating the porch floor that is now a part of the kitchen and there were other days he was underneath putting up wires for the kitchen but the porch I could not figure out. What I learned is getting the porch cleaned off will allow Junior to move things around while he works at remodeling the kitchen. As he removes things he will then have a place to move more of the kitchen pieces to the side porch and open the front porch up for his saws and tools.. From the start of this renovation project this aspect of Junior’s style of working has confused me. I often thought I was helping him by mentioning ways to organize himself, it only irritated him. After a few tries on my part I found myself just sitting. Since I was so fatigued it worked out for both of us. As I started gaining some sort of energy I began asking God to teach me to be what Junior needs me to be, to open my eyes and my heart to him. As he had an area of the house that was livable I began working at keeping it clean. He organized the kitchen to some extent which then allowed me to cook for us. Pretty soon I had a good portion of the house that was neat which allowed me to work at gaining energy. I also saw Junior enjoying our home clean and organized. I have kept up my praying asking God show me how to help Junior. The more we settled into a renovating mode we both were not as anxious. We understood each other’s questions more so. This time I asked Junior to tell me his game plan and he did. I am not anxious for him to get back to the kitchen so I don’t try to point out his to me distracted way of doing things. I see the plan and I now know what is going on. At first God taught me to sit. I needed the sit time due fatigue and mental confusion. The more I gained my health back I kept praying and we were both adapting to each other’s needs. I don’t have that sense of panic these days, I feel useful even though I can’t use tools and stuff. Junior enjoys my gift of cleaning and cooking which makes me feel like I am his partner. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet