December 15 2015

December 18 2015 Greetings My Friend I am moving through my morning as I write. I have had that 1st cup of coffee, checked out Facebook, emails and spent time in the Word. Part of my study time is I journal my studying. Each day I write out five titles, “What is on my mind today, What can I talk to God about today, Scripture- What does God say, What does the Holy Spirit say and lastly How can I serve others today. This last entry has occupied my thoughts in recent days. When I began this journey I felt I needed to do something like serve my husband, help the homeless or such. My thoughts started to move in another direction as I had days of recovering from illness’ such as bronchitis, chronic fatigue. I was learning that part of serving meant that I needed to take care of my health because if I was worn out or sick I could not be as productive. For the past several years I have been on a journey of self discovery. For instance I learned to get help for emotional struggles. I was learning to talk to God about my emotional pain and the more I prayed the more I was learning to get counseling, ask for medication and find emotional support not only from God but find a few close friends to guide me. I had much the same revelation with my physical health concerns. I found a doctor who understood my searching and she led me to medications, procedures and tests. I also found online support groups and natural healing methods like supplements, essential oils and eating less processed food. One step at a time I was gaining energy, not getting as sick as often and an ability to reach out to others. I am an all or nothing kind of person so once I felt able to reach out again I wanted to have set times to volunteer, to take a friend around only to find myself exhausted and unable to function. Ever so slowly it was coming to me that part of serving others was taking time to take care of myself. I find I can only move about life so much any more. I now understand more fully why my energy level never reached the level I knew 10 years ago or more. God wants me to “be still, to quiet myself” so I can serve Him in new ways. He wants me to write about my faith journey, to be available as I can to my husband as he renovates with meals, a clean home and a friend to bounce things off of. The more I have learned to balance these things the more I see God is not wanting me serve Him frantically in an effort to please Him. He has taught me that He is also my rest and my all in all. Along the way I am learning to talk to God about what work He wants me to do each day. Sometimes He wants me to be silly at the store so someone sees the comfortable relationship I have with my husband. Another time a friend needs a ride, some help so God points me/us in this direction. There are days when I am reading the Bible I feel like a lesson is jumping out at me. The lesson may be on the passages I am reading or even on something like the heading on my daily journaling. The more I am learn to slow down and listen the more I see all that I am truly doing. That frantic search to “prove” myself is leaving. I like that. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet