May 12 2015

May 12 2015 Greetings My Friend The watermelon tastes sweet as I eat on it. The cucumbers taste cool and refreshing too. We planted some mint, some butterfly and hummingbird friendly plants and a couple of vegetables we love. It feels good to be honest. The front door is open and I hear a sweet bird song drifting into the house. Slowly I begin forming my plans for this day. Somewhere inside of me I pray that I can enjoy the spring, summer and early fall seasons in their full glory. When I can go out without a coat on and a pair of flip flops on my feet I feel freer than free. I learned more about what is happening within my body. As I work and push myself I feel extra shaky and even weak. It hit me that this is due to a drop in sugar. I am pushing myself so taking a break and eating protein helps me get back to snuff. As I make my way around the house and yard I still sense that my balance has declined more so. It isn’t a huge difference but I know that it is there also. The biggest thing I am learning is to move extra slowly and so far I have not fallen like I was when the balance issues first arose. Sometimes Junior is unaware of his clutter and at first I thought he did not care. He does care but he doesn’t see the clutter in the way I see it. He left his saw out on the porch, a couple of boards and other things in my pathway. I asked him without anger to please move them. At first he did not understand what was in my way so I got specific and those items were removed almost immediately. Just because I have a problem does not mean that Junior is aware of my issue. He is very accommodating when he understands and I have used calm words to explain myself. It has taken me years to understand that people can’t read my mind or know my problems unless I present my struggle in a calm manner. If I were to get huffy and upset because Junior in my mind should have known then we would each have to defend ourselves. Learning to explain my problem and to ask for his help takes the edge away and in the end I get what I need from a willing husband. At first I found Junior’s clutter to be hard to live with. He has a need to live in clutter and I have a need to live without clutter. We both have learned to accommodate each other’s wishes to some extent. I pick up a lot after him and I am comfortable doing so. Junior also does not mind. Many times I pile things in a spot he sits in such as his desk. He puts the things away gladly. We have out buildings in which he can pile things to his heart’s content and I don’t have to deal with it. He is happy and I am comfortable. I have also relaxed some of my standards so he doesn’t have that spotless sense in our home. It is clean and has order and he is comfortable. I too am very comfortable. I am able to move about the house and when he leaves things that are a challenge for me he is willing to move them. He now understands my struggle and I appreciate him so much. Love Janet