December 7 2013

December 7 2013
Greetings My Friend,
Junior's foot fell off of his prosthesis so we made a trip to Johnson City Tn
yesterday. It is 3 hrs there and 3 back and of course we were wasted when we
got home.
When I am that wasted I can't move or even stay awake. I have learned to let it
take its course and in a day or so I am back to square one again. I fell asleep
in my chair a few times last night and then at bedtime I was not sleepy. I was
up until 1:00 and then I slept till 10:00. It is what it is.
I got up in time to hear Junior talking on the phone. His foot has been fixed and
this leg feels better on him than the old leg so he wants to make the run again
today. Even the thought of another day of running wears on me. J should be coming
by today so he will ride with Junior and help with the driving. That makes me very
happy.
Junior amazes me. His back is a mess. His pain level is daily on the high side and
he tends to work past it. He does need a daily nap or two and we've worked with that
through the years. At this point 3 years into our living in this house Junior along
with J has renovated over half the house. He amazes me.
Junior tends to stop when he is extreme pain. I get anxious because the renovating
takes a long time but I am also so proud of what he does that I don't fuss at him
about the slow pace he tends to work at.
As I have more rooms done and I can once again organize I find myself moving out of my
funk. I am setting up my routines and the order I need so desperately tends to fall into
place these days. We've been in this house three years now.
There is not a day that goes by that I don't fall in love with where we are at. I marvel
at God directing us and find myself thanking and praising God frequently throughout the
day.
Even Junior was wore out when we got back yesterday. He sat in his chair next to mine a
lot. At one point he went to visit a neighbor. His wife left after 10 or more years of
marriage. He is bewildered. Junior is trying to be a friend. He mainly listens to this
man and in that hopefully this guy will find his way back to life again.
Ministry comes to mind again. Junior is coming alongside this neighbor. Junior and I are
both divorced and now on a second marriage. He knows what this guy is dealing with. Junior's
wife ran off with her best friend's husband and they lived next door. Junior remember's those
days of trying to find his way so he can minister to this man.
As Junior goes over to be a friend I find us in another ministry and marvel again that it isn't
only in church settings that ministry takes place. We aren't looking at this as a "job" as well.
We want to be a friend to someone who is hurting. If it is also a ministry well and good.
The new lesson I am starting to pick up on is to be willing to reach out as a need arises. The need
often goes deep inside of you. My heart tends to break when I hear of the "Sex trade" industry. I
feel for those people caught in the middle of it all.
Lately I find myself praying for these people. At first I thought if I made any money off of my book
that I would donate to them and to the abuse shelters in the area. I made a little bit and then the
money has not flowed.
This may not be where God wants me at least right now so I wait and try to discern where I am needed
at this moment. I do find though that I tend to have a tender heart in regards to the abuse these
people are struggling with. Somewhere or sometime God will direct my energy in this ministry. On
occassion we send some money. As far as helping in a one on one way I am not able to for many
reasons. My lack of energy and at times I "feel" too much to be of any good. So again I wait and
see.
As I realize the ministry area's I am in I find a comfort level as well. My silliness is a ministry
area. My folding bulletins on Friday's is ministry and I go through my list of ministry moments
again.
I also remember that Jesus did not heal every sick person. When I realize this I begin to see that God
tends to place on my heart where I need to be. The more I listen to God the calmer I feel inside. God
does not need me to be front and center all the time. Sometimes the best work is done in the quiet
times of life. Like Junior stopping by for a short visit with our neighbor.
I am willing to be "bold" for Christ but "bold" is not always an in your face situation. It is being a
friend to an undesirable person. B has been an outcast her whole life and my being her friend at this
point is what she needs. She does have her strange ways but for me I find them to be fine.
In the process of being her friend I find that she often ministers to me. I found that on a lot of the
mission trips as well. We went to help and so often those that we were helping reached right back and
touched an area of my life as well.
I also overcame a lot of prejudice about people. One time we helped AIDS victims. I must admit that scared
me at first but as the week progressed I found a tender heart towards their struggle. In the quiet moment
of accepting them we opened a door for them to respond to Jesus's call. Some did some did not. The thing
is that an opportunity was presented.
My head tells me that it is being willing and doing a small little thing we introduce Jesus. I also find
that God will do the rest and if they come to Him that is good. I was there and did that little tiny
seed planting that was needed.
"Go forth and make disciples of all nations" that pops into my head a lot. I feel God wants me to go out
and live my faith. Sometimes I am able to live it as I go on a mission trip, volunteer etc. Sometimes I
live my faith in the way I treat my husband and my family. The need to be "seen" tends to take a back
seat and I find that I truly like the "seed planing" more than the need to be seen by man.
May God bless you and keep you make His face to shine on you.
Love
Janet