August 3, 2013 Greetings My Friend, Again I stop and remember. My daughter is turning 39 and I truly don’t feel old enough to have a daughter that age. Our re-connecting moment only lasted for a moment so I go on in life living life in the Lord and finding peace in that. Today has started off like many days…..wake up on FB, read the Bible, go for a walk and now I am on the deck soaking up all that surrounds me. I find peace seeping deep into my inner being. These days my walks last for a half hour and I am still winded when I get back but it does feel good. B is here and has made pancakes for us for breakfast…..yup they are good. We went to the Dollar store last night to find some pins to pin the quilt together I am attempting. I don’t know how to quilt but I cut out Junior’s tee shirts and peace them together and find an old sheet of his for the back and I must say I am excited. I won’t have a fancy quilt but it will be a reminder of our life together. That is ok with me. I found a camouflage tee shirt and have decided that it would be good filler and a reminder of Junior’s love of the military. Then there is the tee shirt of him with the grandson and I see this one more or less in the middle of the quilt. I love thinking through my project. I am starting to fill my porch time up with projects like writing a blog, writing in my journal/journals and studying the Scriptures. As life continues to settle I find more peace welling up inside of me. I find the saying “it is what it Is” playing out more in my life and being content regardless of the craziness that wants to burst through., My 5:00 TV time is now turning into 6:00 or later. That feels nice. Slowly I am working myself out of all the TV watching that has filled my days of recent years. That feels wonderful. With the quilt project I have added to my outside time and yup it feels awesome. I also go in for bits to do some sort of housework and I love that as well. The house begins to take shape slowly and it feels nice. I stop writing for a moment and hear a bird or two calling to another. I look around and marvel at the greenery everywhere. The deck is a mess and it is hard for me to process. It is who Junior is through and through the years I’ve learned it will stay messy for a while and all of a sudden it will clean up. I continue to learn to let Junior be Junior and then I am not as frustrated. Anger is not where I reside these days. If it does come it also seems to leave fairly quickly and it feels good. I take a bite of pancake and for some reason it feels good. I do a general remember of this food and enjoy the thoughts that flood my brain. I hear a drill go off and realize that Junior is outside again working on some project. Now I hear the saw. My guy is in the midst of doing work he loves. Again I sense he does a lot of it for me. It feels ever so wonderful. Junior picked out some new towels to hang on the rack on the bathroom door. I had more light colors and he has darker colors. He likes the dark colors of life and me I prefer the light colors. We do have our differences and I often am amazed when they show themselves. We tend to be in sync with each other more often than not and then on occasion I find we do have our differences. I also liked him picking out the towels and bringing them home. I felt like Junior has his input as to how our home looks as much as I do. He climbs up the ladder by the deck and visits me. It is cute. I could see me spending the rest of my days with him even if no one else in the world likes us. We are so content with each other. I learn that I need to quit worrying about what others think and keep my heart on God. If I do I find a peace beyond all understanding and that life is good. I look over and see Junior hanging a piece of lattice up to secure the deck so people don’t fall off (or cats). I love him working. He is all involved in his project and doesn’t seem to notice me here. I know he knows I am here but he is busy with his project and thinking through each step. That is something I have loved doing I love watching Junior think. I can almost walk inside his brain as he begins piecing a project together. Sometimes I even see his eyes moving around as he thinks of the next step. He is involved into today’s project. I am working through my day and it is precious to me. Tonight we will sit side by side in our recliners and watch the News, evening programs and the like. We will talk and be content with each other. That is another precious moment. I am a woman who loves a lot of attention. Junior is learning though that I do like my alone time. I like going in different directions only to come together and share our day. I marvel that I don’t miss working at a job outside the home. I loved it for a long time but now the quieter pace feels extra nice. I am thrilled that Junior and I have years as a retired couple already and prayerfully many more years. Our goal is to be married 50 years. I asked Junior when we married if we could be together for 25 since my previous marriage ended at 24 ½ years. Junior said “let’s go for 50” and that is our goal. God willing. May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you. Love Janet