April 2013 Greetings My Friend, Starting this month I’m going to start writing 3 days a week. This fills my day like a part time job and I enjoy sharing my faith journey. As a child growing up in the 60’s people went to church more than the kids of today do. We all talked about our faith alongside of our other conversations. As I look back my kids’ generation did not do this and many did not even attend church and now my grandchildren know even less. As a young person I believed in God but never got the connection of how to have a personal walk with the Lord. After my divorce I began walking with God in earnest and I often feel God’s presence when life is hurting. I go to God as much as I am able to take my life to God and I continue to find answers and a direction for my life. It feels good frankly. I also don’t feel so alone in this big scary world anymore and that is awesome. My goal in writing is to write about the “every day” walk with God. Some days I do real good and some days I don’t. I continue to feel God’s love even when I am not taking my life to God and that feels wonderful. I no longer feel alone in this big crazy world. I have contentment now that I never knew and at this point I want to learn how to give my all to God. I asked God in a prayer after my divorce for Him to allow me to marry again only this time I wanted my husband to take his faith seriously. Junior takes his faith very seriously and it is awesome. He also helps me in my faith journey and I appreciate that so much. Sunday mornings find us getting up and getting ready for church. There is no discussion, no fight we both want to go to church. It is refreshing to me. Lately I find myself up late at night and sleeping during the day more so if I miss morning church we will go to evening church together. When I am up we do both. When I am not then I go to evening church. When I read the Bible I often will come to a passage and I struggle to understand it. Junior helps me sort through the passage and I appreciate that a bunch. By reading my Bible daily I find that I am learning who God is and what God likes and I find myself continuing to grow in my faith. I love it. It is part of my day along with praying. In fact these days I pray as I go to sleep and when I wake up and then I go to prayer in my comfy chair when I get up in the morning. Our church also has a Bible study guide we do in class so I read that during the week alongside of a study for a women’s group. I tend to need to read a few different types of things and this works for me well. For a while I was also listening during the week to some of the radio preachers. I’d like to get back into that habit. I found that listening to another preacher often opened up more of the Bible to me so I enjoy hearing my own Minister preach alongside of additional teaching. It works for me. I find that the more I immerse myself in the Word, the more contentment I have and that I begin to know what pleases God so I change my life to align with God’s ways. For the first time in my life I like me in my own skin. God loves me just the way I am and then He changes me and it feels wonderful. Sometimes the growing in faith is difficult but to be honest I’d rather be on a faith journey than feel the lonely feelings of yesteryear I knew so well. Lots of people have rejected me, told me I was worth nothing and now I feel I am precious to God and life is worth living. I find myself forgiving easier and yes sometimes I have to talk to God a bunch to be able to forgive. God always helps me forgive and for that I am grateful. There are a couple people that I feel indifferent to but I don’t hate them. That feels wonderful. I continue to ask God to open my heart to these people that I struggle with. I have learned to not forgive is disastrous to my emotional well-being. These days I ask God to guide me as I learn to forgive others. I want to cry “but they….” And God always says that I need to forgive them anyway. When I am able to let go of a hurt….I find peace. I am finding forgiveness is about learning to let go even if you were wronged. I generally try to remember the verse that says “Revenge is mine sayeth the Lord.” When I can give God the struggle I find freedom reigning inside of my being and again it feels wonderful. The more I read the Bible the more I learn how God has made us and that living the way we were made is really a soothing balm to my soul. I am also able to admit my sins to God these days. In the past I was upset bringing my sins to God. I felt I might get beat up for admitting my faults. That has not been the case. When I can give God my sin I soon find myself walking away from that sin and more peace reigning within me. I also learn that I will fall down and when I do God is waiting for me to admit my wrong and love me even more so. Have you read the Bible? Are you on a faith journey? Is it time? May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you. Love Janet