January 9, 2013 Greetings My Friend, As I write it is the end of October and the temps are still hitting 70 during the day and 50 at night overall. I continue to fall in love with my new home state. This weather does not chill me to the bone like a Michigan winter does and for that I am grateful. I am now able to walk to the end of the road a few days during the week. That feels awesome. The nice weather adds to the beauty and the dogs tagging along on my walk always manages to make me giggle. There is a house of little tiny dogs that need to come out in full force and bark…. The simple life is so appealing to me these days. Today has been an at home day. Today I am moving in spurts. I journal a little, go for a walk, journal a bit more, stick the sheets in the dryer, journal again, make the bed, look on line a bit make bread, just the kind where you blend the ingredients from a mix together and soon I will bake the bread. I have wanted to work part time and so far nothing seems to fit right so I have yet to start that task. Today I was talking to P and the church could use some help with a data base and cleaning up the roles. I can do this from home….right up my alley. I slept till 10:00 this morning. We ran to Norton yesterday to take Junior to the ER. He got the pain medication he needs and then we headed to the drugstore and I find that the next day on days like that I tend to need more sleep. With a project I can work on at home at my own pace….that is up my alley. I tend to enjoy being involved in things and frankly since I retired I find I don’t have the energy I once did. I found B and we have done things, I’ve taken her to her treatments. Now that B has been done for almost a year I am up to more things and I realize I need to move slowly. I went with B a couple of days ago and her mammogram did not look right so she is having more stuff done and that feeling of “Oh No” over comes us. I felt that for a few years after I had breast cancer. Once I hit the 5 year mark I found I’m not as worried as I was in the beginning. I must admit though when it is that time each year for my mammogram I tend to hold my breath for a bit till it is over with. It has been two weeks since returning from Michigan and frankly I am starting to feel human again. Today I have walked dusted, made bread, washed the sheets and put them on the bed and at present I am writing. Again I am moving way slower than I have in the past and today I feel like I am going great guns. I love this feeling. Fridays I tend to help fold the bulletins at church which is a joy. I get to be out and with other women and I love it. I am on my own so to speak. It feels good to be able to help and to get out and about with other women. I find myself so excited that I can add one more thing to my week, helping put a data base in order. I can do it at a pace that feels right for me and I won’t be letting people down with my need to sleep late or whatever. I love I will have something to accomplish and be able to help. This girl is about as excited as she can get. Junior has been moving very slowly these days since we returned from Michigan. His back hurts him a lot. He is to the point he needs some sort of pain reliever to help him through this struggle. He resorts to pain relievers only rarely. When he does he is in major pain. I realized that there will be a day that Junior will not be able to move about as well as he does now. I have known it and I haven’t paid a lot of attention at the same time. This round has shown me that indeed he will have a day he can’t be what he is now. That is ok. I don’t like it but that was part of the package when I married him. He is a marvel and has been able to do a whole lot. His strength always encourages me. I’m not the strong person he is but he is an inspiration to me. Junior is now 66 years old and most people think he is in his 50’s. Both Junior and I appear a lot younger than we really are so that can be deceiving at times. We also want to do what we’ve always done and frankly we can’t be that “old” person. That said I find that as my health is settling down I am finding my niche in life and enjoying what I can when I can. I can’t go three or four days a week and work all day like I once did. I must say I am ever grateful that I am able to be home and move at the pace my body will let me and as I accept myself for where I am I find life continues to be sweet overall. The lust full and romantic days of years gone by are gone. We enjoy being each other’s best friend. We enjoy hanging out together and on occasion going in a different direction only to come together to tell about our adventure to be real nice. Some nights Junior needs to sleep in the recliner, he hurts that bad. I miss him and I understand and wait for the day he will return to night time close to me. Until then we have the cats to snuggle up with. The dogs don’t get in bed but will curl up in Junior’s lap as he sleeps in his chair and for some reason those precious rug rats feel real nice. Oh…..time to put the bread in the oven….. May God bless you and keep you make His face to shine upon you. Love Janet