September 11, 2010

Greetings My Friend,

“You reap what you sow” I have been pondering this statement lately. The older I get, the more it makes sense to me. It seems to me that what you do in life will come back to you. If you find partying to be the most important aspect to life then you will find health issues associated with that life style. If you find exercise to be important then you will find that your body will respond to that. When I went through cancer I questioned my Doctor “why me.” She told me that because I had tried to eat right and exercise, then I would be able to move through cancer better. My cancer was caught early. It was found on a routine mammogram. It was so small that I would not have detected it in a physical check. I took the time to get routine mammograms and my cancer was found early and was very fixable. Not all cancer is found with routine checkups, but by doing them. You lessen your chance for serious complications.

I believe that your heart has to be right. Actions don’t fully compensate for what’s in your heart. If you have a lot of bitterness in your heart but try to present yourself as a kind person, your heart will come through and all the kind things will be of no use. I know of a man who often would help people. He would at the drop of a hat, go to help a neighbor, a friend, and a relative outside his own family. His wife and children would not receive the same benefits. His parents had a wood burning stove. It was a gift from the children to them. This man would come home from work, go find wood and chop it. He left the wife and children at home while he chopped. The wife was an at home mother and often needed a break from the children. The man never took the children, never offered to give his wife a break. His parents were thrilled with the wood. He sowed goodness to his parents and his family reaped nothing.

When my Dad was dying, we kids tried to help Mom with the care of Dad. By doing this, Dad never had to go into a nursing home. My daughter and I often spent time with Dad. I had a complaint that I needed to be home with my family. The strange thing is, I was there with my kids, my brother’s family, my sister, my mother and the one complaining chose not to help. It is hard to care for someone who is dying. You know that soon this person will no longer be there. It was easier to complain about my duties as a wife and mother than face the dying.

God says, “Test me, bring your tithes to the storehouse and I will bless you.” One of the things I loved about Junior is that he takes his faith seriously. When we were dating and thinking about marriage, he stated that he tithed. He was going to tithe in his marriage and wondered if I would be agreeable to that. I told him I also tithed my time, was working on giving 10% and had not got there. I was willing to tithe. It was more and more important to me. We came to this marriage tithing time and talent. It has been a blessing beyond words.

I must say that I don’t tithe just to “get” from God. I do it because it is good for me. God tends to make us do things that are good for us. It may seem weird, but the more I walk in faith, I find that God’s ways are truly the best. When I give of my time and talent, I grow. I don’t only focus on “me” and what I want. I begin to see “others” and what they need. As I learn to give, I find life to be sweeter.

It all started way back when I was a youth advisor at church. The more I gave to the teens, the less I focused on the emotional pain I had in my life. For me emotional pain was a way of life. I did not know how to get away from it. My divorce was such a pivotal time in my life. Years of counseling seemed to bring more need for counseling. As I learned that I was a “wanted” child of God, I began to move from despair. When I finally knew that God truly loves me, I’ve been able to let go of years of emotional pain and walk in courage. Giving is good for the soul.

The other thing I like about my faith journey is learning to be honest with my heart. I have to truly give God my heart. Again, I can’t be nice in public and mean at home. I can’t do nice things just to try and get people to like me. I have to do it because I mean it. When I fully realized that I can’t hide from God, I began to clean up my heart. At times it meant that I needed to let go of bitterness. I had to let go of some of my thoughts. The more I cleaned up my heart, I found God living with me more and more. God can’t live in all our junk, He won’t. When I clean the junk up, God will stay and lead me and guide me and it is wonderful. God even helps me clean up the junk, if I ask Him too. As I hear and do, what God is directing me to, I find Him being closer and closer to me.

I found asking for forgiveness to be so healing, if I ask God to help me with sin, He does. I find I don’t desire what I once desired. My heart is/has been changing. I can love people who don’t like me. I can give even if what I give isn’t received. For me that is where my faith journey seems to have taken off. It was asking to be forgiven and then naming the sins. As I ask with a true heart, I find that soon I am not doing that sin any more.
May I ask? Where is your heart? Is it pure?

May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.

Love
Janet