September 12, 2009

Greetings My Friend,

As I write this, it is our last hours in our Redford home:

Another chapter of my life is closing. We are going to leave our Redford home in a little bit and another person will be moving in – renting it for now. I have wandered around this home a few times and memories come – not like I thought, but still I have remembered a little bit.

Junior has made living with him a safe endeavor. In my prayers lately as I get to thanking God, I try to thank Him each day that I have a home to live in. I must admit for a good portion of my life I feared being displaced and having no home to live in. For most of my life I have lived in fear within the homes I have lived in. I remember living in fear at home as a child. Dad told me often that he “gave” up on me. Dad was always pounding on someone – my sister mostly. Mom was always leaving to be away from home, from us. She found it easier to volunteer than to be home with us. It is a habit I picked up in my first marriage.

I was afraid too as an adult. Money was always tight in my first marriage. I was afraid that we would lose our home. I was afraid of my first husband. Home and fear that’s what I knew and lived with.

When I married Junior, I walked into his house and for the first time in my life, I felt safe. It is strange because I only knew Junior for 5 months before we got married and I felt safe with him.

As I prayed my prayers of thanks to God, I began to realize I am going into the third home where I have felt safe. I also marvel that all the years that I worried about being homeless, I have never been homeless. I realize again that God is watching out after me.

So, I stroll around the empty house. There is the plug that Junior put in, it is in the hallway and when I vacuumed the carpet, I never needed to unplug the cord. In our bedrooms Junior redid the closet doors – he made pocket doors so the doors would slide into the wall instead of out in the way. Junior, I smile he made holes in the one closet so that our cats could come from another room and the bedroom door could be closed. On the landing, Junior made a special spot to hang up jackets. That’s the hard part about moving – the special things that made our home unique.

Outside there are our marks as well. Junior has done the gardening for the last few years. Again, I see his style, his mark and I will miss them. In the new home, I am sure that we will have our new mark – for now though, I say good-bye.

In a few short hours, we will leave to truly live in Virginia, no more a home in Michigan and a home in Virginia. It is time to go into the community and grow where we are at. My heart asks God again, “What is our purpose in Virginia? What work are we to do?”

In a year, we will try to sell our home again. Hopefully, we won’t have to take money to the closing like we would if we sold now. Hopefully, we can get a little profit – that would be nice.

As I say good-bye, I pray. I pray for the lady who will be renting our home. I pray for us as we settle in Virginia. I pray that I will also remember this home and the wonderful lessons and moments we had here. The memories come again. Five years ago, Junior retired – back problems. I had cancer. This home was a comfort during that time. Oh, the first year we were here – Mom died. I remember that time as well. We welcomed our beautiful grandchildren here. We had tea parties and Andrew and Papa dug out in the yard for buried treasures.

It is time to say good-bye. It is time to let go. It is time to make new memories in a new home.

May God Bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.

Love

Janet