April 26, 2018

Greetings My Friend,

I remember a game played in the senior high group I advised. The Pastor would ask a question then people would choose a spot where they agreed on the answer. There were 2 spots one was agree, the other was disagree. The question "if they were dating someone exclusively  did they think it alright to date someone else at the same time." The entire group including the Pastor agreed that it was okay except me. I dated one boy for a few weeks when I met the boy I eventually married a few weeks later, I broke off with the 1st boy, dated the other one exclusively. I have always felt one relationship at a time was all I could deal with. I am struggling with today's relaxed standards, willingness to sleep with several different partners before settling into a relationship, for awhile anyway. Marriage is after they decided they lived together was going well. When I went through Divorce Recovery, we were encouraged not to sleep with anyone until marriage. The male instructor talked to the men mostly and reminded them how thoughts of other women could interfere with their marriage relationship. I am grateful I have known only two men, one too many in my life. Junior taught me how he wants to be loved, I taught Junior how I want to be loved and that fills me. It took me awhile to let go of the images of my first marriage relationship, today they are gone and I am grateful. As my grandchildren reach adulthood I see that their parents have had a few relationships outside of marriage, they were not discouraged from doing the same thing. My heart is breaking to see this. The more I have left my first marriage, the more I see where my values were laughed at, ignored. Basically I see my children were drawn to the darker side of life, not the light of Jesus which I have sought. The Bible teaches us that if we are yoked to darkness then the light we had would grow dark, how true this has been in my life. Science bears this out as well. I had a doctor tell me one time the more partners a woman sleeps with, the more likely they will have female problems. Our bodies were made for one partner. As I see the sensual clothes, the glass of beer my heart knows the long road of darkness my grandchild is entering into. Most young people love to try drinking, smoking, doing a few street drugs. Many will out grow this while many won't they end up addicted, used up. I was lucky when I was young because I did play around with drinking, a few street drugs then I walked away. I did not loosing control of my thoughts and as I was invited into immoral things I found drugs were not what I wanted. I drank some after that but I still felt pressured to do what I did not want to do so I pretty much gave up drinking all together, after my divorce I quit completely. I guess my pain comes from being there, desiring others not walking into that dark pit. Today I find the void in my life has been filled by the love of God, the instruction of the Holy Spirit and the example of Jesus. My life is complete in one relationship with my husband and following the teachings of the Bible. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet