March 10, 2018

Greetings My Friend,

Several times a week my prayers find me praying through Jesus' last hours on the way to the cross, I linger at the cross for awhile before I finish praying. Of late, the walk through Jesus' life, death and resurrection hold me for a long time. I can see me throughout Jesus' ministry following Him around soaking up all that He teaches, amazed at His miracles and totally in awe. By the time Jesus is facing His accusers, I can me there as well, betraying Him, condemning Him and I cry as I see the cruelness of sin lashed out on Him. I also see the ugliness of sin as His body is battered, torn and disfigured, I want to cry thinking I may have been an accuser of Jesus, in reality I know that there have been those times as well. I even hear Jesus cry out in anguish "My God, my God why have you forsaken me!" At this moment the reality of hell hits me. In all of eternity Jesus is separated from God for a brief moment and He is pained, then I understand the horror of hell.  Strangely enough I also see the confusion, grief of the Disciples as well, running away, scared, angry.... As I am about to give up hope, I can see the empty tomb, Jesus talking to Mary and her face light up, the Disciple's joy at seeing their beloved teacher. I feel true hope well up inside of me and I know that I know my Redeemer lives! As I look at Jesus my hearts desire is to be like Him, to love like Him oh the joy of Jesus teaching us and yes I want to go forth making disciple's of every nation and tribe. At the cross though I hesitate, can I face what Jesus faced, I ask myself this often, I am unsure until I remember Jesus' not wanting to "take the cup of suffering." God sends His angels to comfort Jesus then He goes to the cross obediently, in strength and dignity He goes and endures. I realize I will never face pain on my own only with God's hand on me. I have to trust and obey, somehow I think I will and can. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet