June 24, 2017

Greetings My Friend, Slowly I am changing my routines around so that I am not in the kitchen so much with the idea I will have energy and time to do a few crafting things and sewing. Junior has turned me onto protein drinks and I am turning them into a breakfast shake with fruit, milk and ice cubes. My oatmeal in a jar days are about over. Junior has undertaken sweeping the sitting room and TV room floors leaving me the kitchen and laundry room floors to sweep. I now need to see if I can cut down one or two naps during the day. I am not as sure about these naps. My sleep pattern at night gets me to sleep at a decent hour although I am sleeping only 6 hours which means I need a mid morning nap. After a couple of hours on my feet doing housework, I need to rest along with the rest comes a nap. When I am on my feet for long periods of time my lower back requires me to rest, the stress in my back tires me out so I need to take a nap. After dinner my time is filled with writing a Facebook page and or a page for my blog. I am happy that I have plenty of things to fill my day with at this point though I need to choose what I want to keep doing and what I am willing to give up. At present I want to eat healthy so I will continue dehydrating food, making bread, muffins and cookies or oatmeal pie. As Junior finishes projects in the kitchen I want to decorate and organize it because we will use the kitchen for the rest of our lives, having it in the order we find comfortable is important. Never in my wildest dreams did I realize that learning to live with a chronic disease would require so much thinking and planning in order to live my life to the fullest. All of this thinking though keeps my brain active, keeps me comfortable with change in my life. I learn to plan my day around my energy spikes, I learn to pick and choose what I want to accomplish day to day and how to choose what I am able to handle. Errand days require that no run days I will need to catch up on my rest and then find a way to catch up on the housework that I missed while running around doing errands. I have learned much watching Junior renovate on the house while taking his much needed naps, seeing his routines being blown with the days we have doctor's appointments, shopping to do etc. He plugs along until all of a sudden he has finished something and I am amazed. In Michigan I thought it was silly for him to mow the back yard one week the front the next, why not do it all at once, was my thought. Today I understand much more fully. Once your body is broken your priorities change. I also am learning to take care of myself first before others. I would rather be the caregiver, this is a roll that I can no longer do. I do not allow myself to get caught up other people drama, including my families drama. I have made peace with what I was, did and did not do. Life has taught me that I cannot undo the past, I can only live life in the moment so I choose to live in the present. My daily time in the Bible helps me make the choices I need to make and gives me the peace to accept my decisions. Because of daily devotion time in the Word, my relationship with Jesus is growing and the drama of being disabled does not occupy my everyday life. As my disease progress' I learn a "new normal" and then I begin to work within those limits, it is what it is. At the end of the day, I enjoy my life and accept my disability. I am not alone Jesus is always a prayer away and Junior shows me that we are a team helping each other as we go along in our broken bodies. God is good and He provides what I need not what I want. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet