July 23 2-15

July 23 2015 Greetings My Friend And sometimes I need to stop for a longer period before attempting to go again so soon. We have gone on 3 vacations in as many months. Since returning from Michigan I have tried the usual lay low for a few days and then I have run hard again. We visited the VA and learned a few things Junior needed to know, the next day we ran to Kingsport to talk to a financial advisor. I sat for another day or so and then we did our usual Sunday routine, next we had visitors and frankly I am barely able to get myself motivated and naps keep falling on me. I felt I was doing the needed work to regroup and I am learning a set program does not mean it will work each time. It is just as important to listen to my body. I have been able to rest a bit and then start running again but now there is not get up and go left in me. At this point I am going to slow down even more so, move as I am able to and hopefully I will once again achieve what I was able to do. I also notice my right hand is shaking more so. I want to will into settling down and it is not listening to me. My handwriting is getting worse and I feel another loss. As I feel this loss my mind searches for ways to study my Bible, write my notes on the computer and to keep moving forward within my body’s limitations. I am a fighter and I am going to give this latest disappointment my best shot. Weighing heavily on my mind is Junior and my son and grandchildren. I sense Junior is getting tired from the heavy load of renovating and I am asking God to bring the help Junior needs. I also know that I need to be open to this help may not come in the neat package my mind has conjured up so I pray that I will accept the way help comes not what I want that help to be. I sense my son and I are growing closer through his struggle as a single father. Sometimes I am relating to him with my pink hearing aids and I have to switch over to the blue hearing aids so I am able to be what my son needs. At this point though we seem to keep talking until we are able to understand the role that is needed. With the latest set of struggles I was able to put him in touch with a Dad who has had to deal with things along the same lines he is dealing with now. With this help I feel that my son will be able to face this new round of struggles. It seems that more recently I am using my mind more and resting my body more so. My daily time of physical activity has been down a lot but my computer work, mind work has been more so and in all of this I am still feeling a sense of being productive, active and useful which means I am not giving into defeat. Right now I am grateful that I can use both my mind and body and I marvel at how God is always using me to my fullest. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet