April 10 2014

April 10 2014

Greetings My Friend,

“This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it.” I keep thinking on this passage as I struggle to breathe. I am overcoming bronchitis and at this point I am gaining energy again.

In the midst of discomfort I attempt to see the “good” in my life. I'd rather focus on the not so good and bemoan the fact that I feel like crud. Instead I focus on “This is the day the Lord has made.” Complaining comes naturally to me. I love to tell anyone in ear shot how bad I feel. I like to get whiny and pitiful. Even though I've walked away from drama I find myself willing to pull it back out from time to time.

I have also learned to sit in my chair and be quiet. I watch TV, get on the computer and move about as I am able. My list of “to do's” go by the wayside. From time to time I put my head over a pot of steaming water which I feel almost right away opening up my lungs.

The more I work at not whining the more I feel like I will live and move past this discomfort so I quit the whining. I give up on the drama once more. It does no good. The less I complain the more I feel like there will be an end to this latest struggle. There will be a brighter day.

I believe that attitude is so important. It took me forever to learn how to adjust my attitude at the same time. With prayer I am able to focus on the good of whatever struggle I am encountering. When I can see some good I tend to move past the struggle easier.

I have also learned to let go of the past that hurt so much. It took years of training but these days I tend to see the past as just that the past. I don't have to stay there anymore and no one has a right to hurt me.

As I learn to let go of the past I also learn to love the present moment. I marvel that I am in a good marriage. I marvel that anger does not have to rule me or my relationship. I marvel that I don't have to be poor for the rest of my life. I also marvel that money does not buy me everything.

A faith journey for me has been to learn to trust. I trust Junior, my friends, my church family and the list goes on. I am not constantly worried that someone is out to hurt me anymore. I don't have to develop a demeanor of meanness just to keep mean people from me.

As I began my journey I wanted to love people I did not want to be a witch to everyone I met. Loving does mean that at times I will be hurt but I don't want to strike back out of fear.

God has helped me move past fear, anger and distrust. I turn to God when I am unsure of a situation. I continue to learn to lean on God for all things and as I do I find myself being in the moment and staying in the moment.

Living in the moment, loving the moment and staying in the moment is an awesome gift from God.

May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you.

Love

Janet