June 1, 2013 Greetings My Friend, A while ago God asked for more of “me.” I remember balking and holding back and telling God that I had given Him all I could. I was floored by my response. I know I’d rather be all in God than without God. So why was I questioning his request? It is hard to say why? I was talking to my mentor this morning and as usual she opened my eyes a bit more to my faith journey. She helps me do this often. Today she told me I need to find a prayer closet space. Now we don’t have closets in this house so I need to find a spot where I go to be closer to God. I pray in bed as I fall asleep and I often pray in my comfy chair but B told me to find a different spot. So I am on a new journey in my prayer life. As we retired and moved Junior and I have gotten away from a daily prayer time together. I still pray for our marriage and I believe Junior prays for our marriage, we aren’t praying together at the same time. He is up for many hours before I am and we are in different parts of our day as we go through the day. It has been a struggle to find that right time to come together. B suggested that as we eat that we open our Bible and read some of the passages regarding marriage, like 1 Corinthians 13. I am intrigued and I see us starting this process real soon. B senses that Junior and I are being called to do something in the Lord. So I will ask Junior to join me in this new phase of our faith journey. I will also find a spot to be alone with God and it will be my special spot for discussions with the Lord. In the past year I have learned to pray during the day. In the past I mainly prayed at night and as I woke up throughout the night. Now that my sleeping has been regulated better I find that I also can pray during the day. I am still using the ACTSS prayer format for the most part. It helps me to begin a conversation. With this format I have also learned to confess, to praise God, to be thankful and name what I am thankful for and then ask God to touch people and I name them starting with my kids and grandchildren. I love giving time to others mainly in a church setting. It is for God or at least I think it is. Lately each time I have tried to help out at the thrift store that supports the abused in our area I find I can’t do the work. I am too tired and unable to make a commitment. I am able to give an hour or so on Fridays to the church preparing the bulletins and pews for Sunday service but the thrift store I find I can’t. I do love being out and about with people. So it grieves me to no end that I can’t volunteer more than I am. Part of my recent past is learning how to sit and be quiet more. I am a hyper woman by nature and this body can’t do the stuff it used to do. It has grieved me a whole bunch. Part of my stillness is to write for the Lord, my blog. I am learning to sit and write sharing my faith journey with others in the hopes that others will meet Jesus or know Him deeper. In the sitting still more I am drawing closer to God as well. I am learning to depend on God for every aspect of my life. So when God asked for more of me and I found myself struggling to let go of more of me I was surprised. I’ve been in prayer asking God to help me. Today my friend took me a little farther and I am sure I will grow even more in the coming days, weeks and years. My friend thinks that God may be calling Junior and me into a ministry together…my thought at present is for marriage. I am not fully sure but it is something we have done in the past. We helped put on workshops for the remarried. We gave a talk or two through the years as well. Maybe out here we are being called to something on this order. I am not sure right now. As the house is more settled with regards to the renovating aspect Junior has found he wants to go to college. He wants to keep his mind active and he feels taking a class will help with that. As I discover my ability with all of the struggles within my body I am finding my niche as well. We as a couple have befriended another B out here. We love her; ask her to watch our fury children and our friendship has grown a bunch. She is in financial need due to living on disability and raising a child who is now grown. I am intrigued. I am excited that we may be entering a new phase in our faith journey with the Lord. So I will ask Junior to join me in a daily time of being together in the Lord. I am sure Junior will not object. We just need to find that special time. I think we will find it as well. I would like to ask you for prayer as we begin this new journey. May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you. Love Janet