February 14, 2009
Song of Songs 2:16
My lover is mine, and I am his.

Greetings My Friend,

Today is Valentine’s Day – a day of romance. To be honest I thought I was not a very romantic woman. I thought Junior and I were not very romantic in nature. We love to go on Marriage Retreats. These retreats have taught us a lot about being married. We usually get a packet with suggestions for romantic activities to indulge in during the retreat. We will have free time during the weekend to be alone and try out some of the suggestions.

Some of the suggestions made me think I was not a romantic person. There was the letting the man comb the woman’s hair – Yuck! How about a picnic on the hotel room floor – Yew! There was the suggestion for a bubble bath together – No Thanks! How about a foot massage! Not for me! Still the seminars were always great. We learned so much and it was worth going.

As the years have passed, I have found that Junior and I do have a romance between us. It is not a Hallmark romance. We aren’t fond of fancy restaurants. I have found that we do have our special moments though. When we were dating Junior told me he loved a woman in flannel pajamas. Not bad… I could deal with that. I found that Junior loves to see me in my tee shirt and underpants as well. That’s me and he likes it. Yeah!

We love to shop. I have so much fun shopping with him. He loves to go to the discount rack and search through each item, looking for that “find.” I fell in love with that right off the bat. Many Friday nights when we worked, we went grocery shopping. It was a date for us - we had fun – we sometimes kissed in the aisle when the aisle was empty. That was so much fun to me. In my first marriage Home Depot was a night mare. I found that with Junior it was actually fun. I remember walking up on him one time. He had a power tool in his hand and he was making the sound of the power tool. I found that because he was willing to do “girl” shopping, I didn’t mind doing “guy” shopping. It was fun.

We were talking to our nutritionist recently about dating. I stated that if a guy is willing to do a “girl” type of romantic activity, then the girl should also be willing to a “guy” type of romantic activity. It might mean that they go out to a nice restaurant for her and for him, they go shooting. I am starting to see that what I find romantic does not mean it is for Junior.
I find that guys love to do guy things. When we were dating our men, many of us were
willing to do that with them. Guys seem to like us being near them and then when we marry them, we decide we don’t want to do that anymore.

Maybe as you do something for Valentine’s Day, you might want to surprise your guy and do his manly thing he loves, like going to the gun range, bowling, fixing on an antique car.

I also would like to suggest that you do frequent date nights with your husband. It is important for your marriage to stay in tune with each other. Again, date night does not have to be expensive. When we were working and tired sometimes our date night was to watch a video. Sometimes we find old furniture and refurbish it. Take time to be alone with each other, to talk about your dreams. When you do that, you are truly keeping your marriage alive.

May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.

Love
Janet