October 11, 2016

Greetings My Friend, I hear it down deep inside of me as I read. I feel sad and I almost know how God feels as I read 3 times in Ezekiel 30 God says "Then they will know that I am the the Lord." I have a daughter who will not call me Mom or Mother, she insists on calling me by my given name Janet, I hurt when she does this even though I keep correcting her and asking her to call me Mom. To me it is a slap in the face for the love and work I did while raising her. Now that I see God cries out to us to acknowledge Him as the Lord,our God I truly understand His sadness. He created us, the awesome world around us and we think we are on the same level as He is. He displays His awesome power to the Jewish nation time after time. They are in awe of God when He rescues them for but a moment before they are back to worshiping false idols, made of wood and stone and cannot breathe. God parted the Red sea to have the people of Jacob pass by on dry land for them to forget a few chapters later and moan about being brought out into the desert to die of hunger and thirst. God displays His awesome power over and over generation after generation only to find that past believers and current believers will soon forget what He has done for them. God teaches us to give Him accolades, to confess, to be thankful and to ask for what His people need and His people soon quit worshiping the true God in favor of a feel good god and a what have you done for me lately attitude which often requires more than the true God. All God wants is to be acknowledged and revered by His creation and His creation refuses. I find that we humans seek to be acknowledged and loved all the time. I want the love and acceptance of my husband, my children and when I do not have that my life is full of great sadness. If I feel this way then I think our true God feels a pain just as deep. When I return from a long day away from home I go to the phone and see who called but may have not left a message in the hopes one of my children has called me. Time after time I do not see their phone number on the caller ID as I scan it. I feel a sense of loss and a deep sadness well inside of me and many times I turn to God for the comfort I seek. He always fills that huge void in my life and I soon let go of that not wanted feeling. Day after day I find that I rely on God so deeply to help me to face each trial I face, every moment of despair that attempts to overwhelm me. I long to please God with all of my heart and soul and mind. I even have moments where I am afraid if my deepest longing in my heart were to be fulfilled I would soon forget all the times God was at my side holding me, comforting me. I pray I never forget the things He has done in my life and I practice the ACTSS format as much as I am able. I try to give God the glory, accolades by telling Him how awesome He is. Next I learn to confess I truly believe that confession is good for the soul. The more I admit that I am sinning in a certain area I see God guiding me out of that sin and into a wholeness I never believed possible. Next I am thankful. Being thankful each day and throughout the day shows me my life is not as awful I have thought it was. Lately I marvel at the simple things I take for granted like a warm home to live in, food for the table and clothes for each season. These simple daily routines bring me close to God, not the fancy house, material things but realizing I have a home,with a bed to sleep in, food to eat as I need to eat and clothes for my body. Remembering all the times God has been by my side astounds me and keeps me walking in faith. I pray that I never ever disrespect God again. As I proofread this to my husband He gave me another passage which makes sense to me. In Hebrews 11:6 I find that God wants us to know that He is. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet