November 26 2015

November 26 2015 Greetings My Friend Each day I have more energy, I am shaking a lot less and my balance is increasing again. Then today I wake up tired, I nap a few times and getting myself moving is a major chore. I have been active again but today getting out of my chair is hard to do. I understand the Chronic Fatigue part of my disability on a deeper level today. I want to enter into my routine of cleaning, cooking and writing but my body acts as if I ran a marathon yesterday. I did my usual routines, nothing out of the ordinary but today I feel so beat up. I have struggled slightly with asthma this past week. It is seasonal allergies and for the most part I have been able to keep from developing bronchitis. I am using my inhaler and essential oils as I feel the congestion creep in. These measures so far are working because today the congestion has not crept in on me. I am the eternal optimist. The minute I have a few days in a row of some sort of energy, feeling good I think that things are going to turn around and I will be the active woman I have always been. About the time I start feeling like the “old” me I get a reality check like fatigue so draining that I think I am drowning in tiredness. Some days I even think that I will stay at my new normal without these days of draining fatigue and then this fatigue plagues me. I nap, wake up look at the internet, drink my coffee and soon I am napping again. Through the years I am learning to sit when I can’t and move when I can. I have quit looking at the clock and berating myself. When I feel even the smallest amount of energy I start slowly doing the routines I have set up. I may do one or two things today and as I can I add to the routine. This summer’s heat took me to a new level of being drained. As the heat and humidity went away I was still tired. I was out of breath still and fatigue became a daily reality. I was sleeping all night and taking a 2hr nap in the afternoon most days. Even brushing my teeth was hard, I needed to sit just to brush my teeth. I kept doing what I had learned to do, work, sit and work again but still my energy was not coming back. After a month or so of this it came to me that I was entering into a new stage in my disability so I went to the doctor. I was displaying potential heart problems so my doctor sent me to the hospital. After a work up of tests my heart is healthy. At my next visit the doctor put me on a new medication. This medication has settled many of my symptoms and I am almost back to my old new normal. I can once more stand to brush my teeth and my activity level has increased again. I tell myself that this fatigue should not have happened. Next I realize that this fatigue has been with me for many years now. I can not work through it as I once did and I need to accept that fatigue is here to stay. I don’t beat myself up and I talk myself into starting from the start again. Work when I can and sit when I can’t. I know that soon I will be functioning again. This latest round of struggles has taught me to check in with the doctor quicker instead of attempting to keep pushing myself. May God bless you and keep you make His face shine on you. Love Janet