October 30, 2010
Greetings My Friend,
Our closing is a few days away on the house. Our dreams of making it the way we want flow out of our thoughts daily. We’ve been to Michigan, shopped at Sears Outlet and bought most of our appliances, buying a washer and dryer at a recondition store. The dryer did not make it back with us, not enough room. We will pick that up later.
Even though it will be a few months before we move in, we are working on our dream. I am excited and not. I am definitely tired of moving. Still, I am finding things I always wanted to be part of this home and that is exciting to me. The enclosed porch is so wonderful. My office will be in there. The kitchen will open into the enclosed porch. I am thinking a small table near the window where we can eat and look out at the woods would be quaint. I am thinking that my and Junior’s desks will both be in there. A screen separating Junior’s desk and enclosing it appeals to me. He is “messy” and this little area is one where he can be messy and I won’t have to look at it. Kind of like when the kids were little, I had them shut the door and then I did not have to look at their messy rooms.
The kitchen will be cute too. We are keeping the wood burning cook stove, so that will be a focal point as well as a wonderful back up should the power go out like it did last winter for 11 days.(with 9 acres and most of them are woods, we should have enough wood). We are having the dining room wall opened up and putting an island in where we will eat. A built in stove will be put in as well. There are two fire places in the home both in bedrooms, one we will take the wall down and make part of the front room and the other will be our family room which will open up to the dining room. Those will be turned into gas fireplaces.
December is the goal for moving into our new home. The nice thing is we are staying in Haysi till most of the renovations are done. I won’t have to deal with the confusion of the mess of remodeling and my allergies will appreciate that as well. There is so much work…that overwhelms me at times, not that I have to do it, still it does overwhelm me.
This move in many ways will be easier than our move from Michigan. We are already taking things over to the house so when the final move comes it should be fairly easy. Most of the things have been gone through and gotten rid of, that is nice. Once we settle in and re-group we will put a bedroom, bathroom and a utility room for our washer and dryer. Again I am receiving dreams I thought I’d never have. A master bedroom, with a walk in closet and a master bathroom…Wow! When we have company then they can be at one end of the house with their own bathroom and we will be at the other end with our own bathroom. My dream home is taking shape. I never thought I’d have all my dreams in one home. My office on the enclosed porch looking out at woods, nature and a table to eat and look out the window on are all dreams I’ve had forever. The wrap around porches are icing on the cake so to speak.
In our minds, this is our last home. We will grow older and feebler here so we are planning for those days as well. We will put in wider door walls, wheel chair ramps outside and a roll in shower for those days. I have the Rogers’ struggle with paint. We tend to get bronchitis when we paint as we get older, so we are looking for light colored wall board – no need to paint then. Even the yard will slowly give way to more gravel for parking, car ports etc.
It seems that we are planning for what we like, for our future as well. I like the idea of being able to stay in my home as I age, not moving. If we are doing this right then more than likely we won’t have to move to assisted living or even a nursing home hopefully. We kids gave Mom and Dad that, they were able to live in their home and they even died in the home. I hope I can do that as well, die in my own home.
My kids get upset when I talk about that day, the time of my death. The older I get the more I realize that this is a reality. Planning these little details helps me because then I feel I may truly get to stay in my own comfortable home. Grandma was stuck in an upstairs bedroom because that is where the bathroom was and was not able to be with people. This one story home does not shut me off from visitors. Again, Junior and I will be able to do laundry, etc because everything is on one floor.
Junior and I have our wills as well. We have taken care of our caskets and hopefully made clear what our desires are. To be honest, I’d like for the kids not to worry about “what would” Mom want? I have hopefully made those decisions. As much as I would rather not think about these things, I realize that death is a reality, so I try hard to prepare for that day. I also realize that amends are needed to be made. Some of that, I’ve done what I can, and then it is up to the other person to meet me half way. It is so hard to work through relationship struggles when someone has passed on. As I moved in with Mom, I realized I needed to deal with some underlying struggles. I had spent many years working through struggles with my Dad. I had made peace by the time he died and I was able to hold him as he died. After my divorce, I had to work through anger at my ex. That is settled in my heart now. I can see him without fear, without anger. As life moves along, I find relationships that God points me to. I ask Him to help me deal with the hurt and anger and He has been faithful. As the end comes, I am finding I’ve done all I can and there is peace in my heart.
This move is a little different than the other moves in my life. It is a realization that my life will come to an end more than likely in this home. I do believe I have many more years to live. I have never smoked, drank very little, and did drugs for a very short time. These health choices I believe indicate a possible long life ahead of me. Both of my grandmothers did live to their 80’s, another indication of a possible long life. Of course Grandpa C, Dad and Mom died before their 65 birthday, so it is hard to say for certain. They were all heavy smokers and would not/could not give it up.
As I close, I ask again, is there someone you need to make amends with? You know it is so hard when they are gone. Once more forgiveness is more for you than the one you are forgiving. When you carry anger and hurt around, it is not healthy for you.
May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.
Love
Janet
Friday, October 29, 2010
Saturday, October 23, 2010
October 23, 2010
Greetings My Friend,
As I write I am in the last stages of getting my book published, it may sell, it may not. My dream, my desire is that I make money so I can donate a good portion of it. Junior and I have a decent income, a comfortable lifestyle so becoming rich is not the goal. The goal is to tell about how God has been such a wonderful healing presence in my life. The goal is if I make money is to give most of it away.
For a long time now, I’ve had a heart for those that are abused. When I read about the sex slave industry that abounds, my heart feels ripped open and raw and I want to help these people in some way. I’ve also learned that because of my sensitivity to this area, I may not be good at one on one help either. When you are a victim many times that is how you view your life, as a victim and that does not help you move forward when you allow your thinking to remain as though you are a victim. So, how can I help? My thoughts at this time are to donate to victims of abuse, the sex slave industry. My prayer is that I make enough money to donate to those organizations that help these people.
God has been such a healing presence in my life, so I’d like to find a way to point these people to God as well. God has held me so tenderly at times. Junior is a tender man with me, he is comfortable. God has held me even more so tenderly. God has given me to Junior and Junior to me. I guess what I’m trying to say is that God has given me the ability to write. He has given us a comfortable lifestyle and my genuine desire is to give back. As a Christian, I tend to have a desire to give as I have been given to. So, I’d like to give to those who are in need and are abused. Many times I read of people who go through a struggle. When they get to the other side, they then have a tendency to want to reach out to those who have helped them, cancer comes to mind, once someone has had cancer, a loved one, I hear of people becoming involved with organizations that help those with cancer. Sometimes it is donating. Sometimes people give of their time.
I also think back to when I was a child, when Dad had polio. Our church was the one who stepped beside us and helped us live life at the most basic level. We always had food to eat, clothes to wear. I’ve learned through the years that it isn’t name brand, designer clothes that really matter. It is something warm in the winter and cool in the summer that matter most. Besides clothes and food, this church often was just there as we learned how to get back on our feet once more. Mom and Dad served on boards at church Mom and us kids helped with weddings, us kids were in the choir, went to camp and we grew up in this church’s love.
Abuse was part of what we experienced at home as well. Dad, left home at 14, the abuse was that bad for him. Mom wound up being the bread winner for the family, at a time when women didn’t work. Life at the most basic level was hard on all of us. Dad dealt with not being the provider, with his wife being the bread winner plus all the junk that went on when he was a kid. As I have said often, the main goal was to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table and there was little energy for the nurturing we needed. Still, I find that God has guided me as I have opened my heart and asked for help. I have been able to overcome for the most part the affects of abuse. I have been able to be a help mate and help provide for my family by working, being a Mom who made meals for her family, ran kids to various activities and such. I was even able to stay home for many years, something I wanted my Mom to be able to do. I always understood her need to work. Still I remember wishing she was at home as well.
For the last many years, I’ve been telling people, “When I grow up, I want to be a writer.” I guess with this blog and now a book out. I am a writer and can no longer dream of becoming a writer. I am a writer. I pray there will be more books, maybe even another blog or two, who knows? I retired from the bank with a goal of being a writer. I guess I am not fully retired if I am writing….that’s ok to. I like that I can work more part-time now, when I feel like most days and not be stuck with a demanding 9-5 type job. Sometimes when I am awake at night I write. Sometimes on Sunday afternoons a blog will come to me. I like my more relaxed work schedule. I can even take my computer with me and write while on vacation, driving down the road on a road trip. This more relaxed life style is very pleasant. I’ve needed to slow down. My body has been telling me that for some time.
My prayer is that you will buy my book, will enjoy it and come to know Jesus. My goal is to introduce Jesus to people who have not met Him and then hopefully begin a faith journey with Him. I also hope to generate enough money to donate to the sex slave trade industry, to the abused.
Oh, my book is titled, On the Way to Wholeness, by way of ACTSS. Won’t you consider picking up a copy? Xlibereas is the publisher and can be found on line through Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.com.
May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.
Love
Janet
Greetings My Friend,
As I write I am in the last stages of getting my book published, it may sell, it may not. My dream, my desire is that I make money so I can donate a good portion of it. Junior and I have a decent income, a comfortable lifestyle so becoming rich is not the goal. The goal is to tell about how God has been such a wonderful healing presence in my life. The goal is if I make money is to give most of it away.
For a long time now, I’ve had a heart for those that are abused. When I read about the sex slave industry that abounds, my heart feels ripped open and raw and I want to help these people in some way. I’ve also learned that because of my sensitivity to this area, I may not be good at one on one help either. When you are a victim many times that is how you view your life, as a victim and that does not help you move forward when you allow your thinking to remain as though you are a victim. So, how can I help? My thoughts at this time are to donate to victims of abuse, the sex slave industry. My prayer is that I make enough money to donate to those organizations that help these people.
God has been such a healing presence in my life, so I’d like to find a way to point these people to God as well. God has held me so tenderly at times. Junior is a tender man with me, he is comfortable. God has held me even more so tenderly. God has given me to Junior and Junior to me. I guess what I’m trying to say is that God has given me the ability to write. He has given us a comfortable lifestyle and my genuine desire is to give back. As a Christian, I tend to have a desire to give as I have been given to. So, I’d like to give to those who are in need and are abused. Many times I read of people who go through a struggle. When they get to the other side, they then have a tendency to want to reach out to those who have helped them, cancer comes to mind, once someone has had cancer, a loved one, I hear of people becoming involved with organizations that help those with cancer. Sometimes it is donating. Sometimes people give of their time.
I also think back to when I was a child, when Dad had polio. Our church was the one who stepped beside us and helped us live life at the most basic level. We always had food to eat, clothes to wear. I’ve learned through the years that it isn’t name brand, designer clothes that really matter. It is something warm in the winter and cool in the summer that matter most. Besides clothes and food, this church often was just there as we learned how to get back on our feet once more. Mom and Dad served on boards at church Mom and us kids helped with weddings, us kids were in the choir, went to camp and we grew up in this church’s love.
Abuse was part of what we experienced at home as well. Dad, left home at 14, the abuse was that bad for him. Mom wound up being the bread winner for the family, at a time when women didn’t work. Life at the most basic level was hard on all of us. Dad dealt with not being the provider, with his wife being the bread winner plus all the junk that went on when he was a kid. As I have said often, the main goal was to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table and there was little energy for the nurturing we needed. Still, I find that God has guided me as I have opened my heart and asked for help. I have been able to overcome for the most part the affects of abuse. I have been able to be a help mate and help provide for my family by working, being a Mom who made meals for her family, ran kids to various activities and such. I was even able to stay home for many years, something I wanted my Mom to be able to do. I always understood her need to work. Still I remember wishing she was at home as well.
For the last many years, I’ve been telling people, “When I grow up, I want to be a writer.” I guess with this blog and now a book out. I am a writer and can no longer dream of becoming a writer. I am a writer. I pray there will be more books, maybe even another blog or two, who knows? I retired from the bank with a goal of being a writer. I guess I am not fully retired if I am writing….that’s ok to. I like that I can work more part-time now, when I feel like most days and not be stuck with a demanding 9-5 type job. Sometimes when I am awake at night I write. Sometimes on Sunday afternoons a blog will come to me. I like my more relaxed work schedule. I can even take my computer with me and write while on vacation, driving down the road on a road trip. This more relaxed life style is very pleasant. I’ve needed to slow down. My body has been telling me that for some time.
My prayer is that you will buy my book, will enjoy it and come to know Jesus. My goal is to introduce Jesus to people who have not met Him and then hopefully begin a faith journey with Him. I also hope to generate enough money to donate to the sex slave trade industry, to the abused.
Oh, my book is titled, On the Way to Wholeness, by way of ACTSS. Won’t you consider picking up a copy? Xlibereas is the publisher and can be found on line through Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.com.
May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.
Love
Janet
October 23, 2010
Greetings My Friend,
As I write I am in the last stages of getting my book published, it may sell, it may not. My dream, my desire is that I make money so I can donate a good portion of it. Junior and I have a decent income, a comfortable lifestyle so becoming rich is not the goal. The goal is to tell about how God has been such a wonderful healing presence in my life. The goal is if I make money is to give most of it away.
For a long time now, I’ve had a heart for those that are abused. When I read about the sex slave industry that abounds, my heart feels ripped open and raw and I want to help these people in some way. I’ve also learned that because of my sensitivity to this area, I may not be good at one on one help either. When you are a victim many times that is how you view your life, as a victim and that does not help you move forward when you allow your thinking to remain as though you are a victim. So, how can I help? My thoughts at this time are to donate to victims of abuse, the sex slave industry. My prayer is that I make enough money to donate to those organizations that help these people.
God has been such a healing presence in my life, so I’d like to find a way to point these people to God as well. God has held me so tenderly at times. Junior is a tender man with me, he is comfortable. God has held me even more so tenderly. God has given me to Junior and Junior to me. I guess what I’m trying to say is that God has given me the ability to write. He has given us a comfortable lifestyle and my genuine desire is to give back. As a Christian, I tend to have a desire to give as I have been given to. So, I’d like to give to those who are in need and are abused. Many times I read of people who go through a struggle. When they get to the other side, they then have a tendency to want to reach out to those who have helped them, cancer comes to mind, once someone has had cancer, a loved one, I hear of people becoming involved with organizations that help those with cancer. Sometimes it is donating. Sometimes people give of their time.
I also think back to when I was a child, when Dad had polio. Our church was the one who stepped beside us and helped us live life at the most basic level. We always had food to eat, clothes to wear. I’ve learned through the years that it isn’t name brand, designer clothes that really matter. It is something warm in the winter and cool in the summer that matter most. Besides clothes and food, this church often was just there as we learned how to get back on our feet once more. Mom and Dad served on boards at church Mom and us kids helped with weddings, us kids were in the choir, went to camp and we grew up in this church’s love.
Abuse was part of what we experienced at home as well. Dad, left home at 14, the abuse was that bad for him. Mom wound up being the bread winner for the family, at a time when women didn’t work. Life at the most basic level was hard on all of us. Dad dealt with not being the provider, with his wife being the bread winner plus all the junk that went on when he was a kid. As I have said often, the main goal was to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table and there was little energy for the nurturing we needed. Still, I find that God has guided me as I have opened my heart and asked for help. I have been able to overcome for the most part the affects of abuse. I have been able to be a help mate and help provide for my family by working, being a Mom who made meals for her family, ran kids to various activities and such. I was even able to stay home for many years, something I wanted my Mom to be able to do. I always understood her need to work. Still I remember wishing she was at home as well.
For the last many years, I’ve been telling people, “When I grow up, I want to be a writer.” I guess with this blog and now a book out. I am a writer and can no longer dream of becoming a writer. I am a writer. I pray there will be more books, maybe even another blog or two, who knows? I retired from the bank with a goal of being a writer. I guess I am not fully retired if I am writing….that’s ok to. I like that I can work more part-time now, when I feel like most days and not be stuck with a demanding 9-5 type job. Sometimes when I am awake at night I write. Sometimes on Sunday afternoons a blog will come to me. I like my more relaxed work schedule. I can even take my computer with me and write while on vacation, driving down the road on a road trip. This more relaxed life style is very pleasant. I’ve needed to slow down. My body has been telling me that for some time.
My prayer is that you will buy my book, will enjoy it and come to know Jesus. My goal is to introduce Jesus to people who have not met Him and then hopefully begin a faith journey with Him. I also hope to generate enough money to donate to the sex slave trade industry, to the abused.
Oh, my book is titled, On the Way to Wholeness, by way of ACTSS. Won’t you consider picking up a copy? Xlibereas is the publisher and can be found on line through Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.com.
May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.
Love
Janet
Greetings My Friend,
As I write I am in the last stages of getting my book published, it may sell, it may not. My dream, my desire is that I make money so I can donate a good portion of it. Junior and I have a decent income, a comfortable lifestyle so becoming rich is not the goal. The goal is to tell about how God has been such a wonderful healing presence in my life. The goal is if I make money is to give most of it away.
For a long time now, I’ve had a heart for those that are abused. When I read about the sex slave industry that abounds, my heart feels ripped open and raw and I want to help these people in some way. I’ve also learned that because of my sensitivity to this area, I may not be good at one on one help either. When you are a victim many times that is how you view your life, as a victim and that does not help you move forward when you allow your thinking to remain as though you are a victim. So, how can I help? My thoughts at this time are to donate to victims of abuse, the sex slave industry. My prayer is that I make enough money to donate to those organizations that help these people.
God has been such a healing presence in my life, so I’d like to find a way to point these people to God as well. God has held me so tenderly at times. Junior is a tender man with me, he is comfortable. God has held me even more so tenderly. God has given me to Junior and Junior to me. I guess what I’m trying to say is that God has given me the ability to write. He has given us a comfortable lifestyle and my genuine desire is to give back. As a Christian, I tend to have a desire to give as I have been given to. So, I’d like to give to those who are in need and are abused. Many times I read of people who go through a struggle. When they get to the other side, they then have a tendency to want to reach out to those who have helped them, cancer comes to mind, once someone has had cancer, a loved one, I hear of people becoming involved with organizations that help those with cancer. Sometimes it is donating. Sometimes people give of their time.
I also think back to when I was a child, when Dad had polio. Our church was the one who stepped beside us and helped us live life at the most basic level. We always had food to eat, clothes to wear. I’ve learned through the years that it isn’t name brand, designer clothes that really matter. It is something warm in the winter and cool in the summer that matter most. Besides clothes and food, this church often was just there as we learned how to get back on our feet once more. Mom and Dad served on boards at church Mom and us kids helped with weddings, us kids were in the choir, went to camp and we grew up in this church’s love.
Abuse was part of what we experienced at home as well. Dad, left home at 14, the abuse was that bad for him. Mom wound up being the bread winner for the family, at a time when women didn’t work. Life at the most basic level was hard on all of us. Dad dealt with not being the provider, with his wife being the bread winner plus all the junk that went on when he was a kid. As I have said often, the main goal was to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table and there was little energy for the nurturing we needed. Still, I find that God has guided me as I have opened my heart and asked for help. I have been able to overcome for the most part the affects of abuse. I have been able to be a help mate and help provide for my family by working, being a Mom who made meals for her family, ran kids to various activities and such. I was even able to stay home for many years, something I wanted my Mom to be able to do. I always understood her need to work. Still I remember wishing she was at home as well.
For the last many years, I’ve been telling people, “When I grow up, I want to be a writer.” I guess with this blog and now a book out. I am a writer and can no longer dream of becoming a writer. I am a writer. I pray there will be more books, maybe even another blog or two, who knows? I retired from the bank with a goal of being a writer. I guess I am not fully retired if I am writing….that’s ok to. I like that I can work more part-time now, when I feel like most days and not be stuck with a demanding 9-5 type job. Sometimes when I am awake at night I write. Sometimes on Sunday afternoons a blog will come to me. I like my more relaxed work schedule. I can even take my computer with me and write while on vacation, driving down the road on a road trip. This more relaxed life style is very pleasant. I’ve needed to slow down. My body has been telling me that for some time.
My prayer is that you will buy my book, will enjoy it and come to know Jesus. My goal is to introduce Jesus to people who have not met Him and then hopefully begin a faith journey with Him. I also hope to generate enough money to donate to the sex slave trade industry, to the abused.
Oh, my book is titled, On the Way to Wholeness, by way of ACTSS. Won’t you consider picking up a copy? Xlibereas is the publisher and can be found on line through Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.com.
May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.
Love
Janet
Friday, October 15, 2010
October 16, 2010
Greetings My Friend,
For me, Sunday is the most important day in the week. Going to church, come home take a nap, eat and then going back is a joy to me. Our Minister out here opens the Bible up to me in so many wonderful ways. He will take a passage, go over it line by line and I am amazed at the wonderful lessons to be found.
These lessons help me as I read through the Bible in my own time. I learn ways to focus on words within a passage, to break them down and look even further. It is awesome. I walk away from Sunday morning services refreshed, in awe and renewed. Bible study time with him does a lot of the same, this time though we are able to raise our hands and ask questions as we go along.
I remember being in a conversation one time and the friend told me that while I was at church she was out finding bargains at garage sales. To be honest, I would rather be at church worshiping and fellowshipping with other believers. For a few hours I am amongst believers and I feel re-charged and renewed. Church is a place where I am accepted as I am. I am loved, encouraged and strengthened. I don’t miss out on much in my opinion. I am with people who love me the way I am. During the week I deal with people pointing out my every flaw. I deal with people who can drain me physically and emotionally.
To me church is an opportunity to tell God how important He is in my life. It is a time of giving God glory, loving Him with abandon. Coming together as a community of believers is awesome. I also am open to ways I can serve the Lord. I am able to hear of needs for others and then am able to reach out where I am able to love, to serve and to give. These opportunities also open up new skills for me. I learn, I grow as I give.
Through the years, I have been able to take on different tasks. When I was in junior and senior high school I helped with putting on a wedding meal. When my children were small, I was choir robe Mom. I helped the children get into their robes, helped line them up and sometimes sat with them during the service. Later I became a senior high youth advisor. When Junior and I married, we helped put on workshops for the re-married. A couple of times we even gave a talk. For the last little while, I’ve learned to minister outside of church. I learned ministry does not need to be within a church proper. We’ve done mission trips but lately it seems I am called to live my faith within my community.
Part of my work also seems to be writing. God has given me a desire to write, has given me an ability to put words together for people to read. I get enough comments to where I feel compelled to continue on. My first book is written, I’ve been writing a blog for two years now. Writing is something I love to do.
When we first moved to Virginia, I felt like we were led to the community of Haysi. I felt a call to live as if Jesus were my Savior with my neighbor’s watching me. I truly thought we’d be here for a long time. Now we’ve been led to a house in a new community that we are renovating. It will be our retirement home. As we begin to transition, I sense that a new call will be to have a Bible study for the women who work at church, in the community.
For the longest time, I did not feel I was serving unless it was done at church in an organized fashion. We have friends who have felt a call to minister to their Muslim neighbors. We’ve helped them help their neighbors. One year we did a mission outreach to the neighborhood. When I retired I helped watch the children while their mom’s learned English as a second language. When we moved to Virginia, these friends needed a time of rest. We loaned them our house, so they could physically be away from their work.
From them I have learned that reaching out is often a relationship building process. I t is not always a “you show up to a place” and touch people for an hour or a weekend. It is a process of living, loving and sharing life in the Lord that often will open people’s eyes to the Jesus we have come to know and love.
I am often amazed. Through the years as I have learned to “give” I’ve been given to more than I “gave.” I am constantly amazed at this. I’ve been to Nicaragua helping an orphanage build more buildings for the orphans. I mainly helped with getting food ready for the campers to eat. The young girls taught me how to fry food. To be honest I have hardly ever fried my food. I struggled with knowing when it was done. Those kids came in and loved on us as we worked, as we ate and that was a precious time. Each mission trip astounds me as we go to help, we find ourselves being given to as much as we give.
To me it is important to be a part of a church family. This family is there for you and you for them. I’ve cried with my church family, I rejoiced with them. The community of believers back when I was young was there for my family. They helped us get back on our feet after Dad had polio. They stood beside us, they laughed with us and they cried with us.
Do you have a community of people to rest in? Are there people for you to serve waiting for your hand of love?
May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.
Love
Janet
Greetings My Friend,
For me, Sunday is the most important day in the week. Going to church, come home take a nap, eat and then going back is a joy to me. Our Minister out here opens the Bible up to me in so many wonderful ways. He will take a passage, go over it line by line and I am amazed at the wonderful lessons to be found.
These lessons help me as I read through the Bible in my own time. I learn ways to focus on words within a passage, to break them down and look even further. It is awesome. I walk away from Sunday morning services refreshed, in awe and renewed. Bible study time with him does a lot of the same, this time though we are able to raise our hands and ask questions as we go along.
I remember being in a conversation one time and the friend told me that while I was at church she was out finding bargains at garage sales. To be honest, I would rather be at church worshiping and fellowshipping with other believers. For a few hours I am amongst believers and I feel re-charged and renewed. Church is a place where I am accepted as I am. I am loved, encouraged and strengthened. I don’t miss out on much in my opinion. I am with people who love me the way I am. During the week I deal with people pointing out my every flaw. I deal with people who can drain me physically and emotionally.
To me church is an opportunity to tell God how important He is in my life. It is a time of giving God glory, loving Him with abandon. Coming together as a community of believers is awesome. I also am open to ways I can serve the Lord. I am able to hear of needs for others and then am able to reach out where I am able to love, to serve and to give. These opportunities also open up new skills for me. I learn, I grow as I give.
Through the years, I have been able to take on different tasks. When I was in junior and senior high school I helped with putting on a wedding meal. When my children were small, I was choir robe Mom. I helped the children get into their robes, helped line them up and sometimes sat with them during the service. Later I became a senior high youth advisor. When Junior and I married, we helped put on workshops for the re-married. A couple of times we even gave a talk. For the last little while, I’ve learned to minister outside of church. I learned ministry does not need to be within a church proper. We’ve done mission trips but lately it seems I am called to live my faith within my community.
Part of my work also seems to be writing. God has given me a desire to write, has given me an ability to put words together for people to read. I get enough comments to where I feel compelled to continue on. My first book is written, I’ve been writing a blog for two years now. Writing is something I love to do.
When we first moved to Virginia, I felt like we were led to the community of Haysi. I felt a call to live as if Jesus were my Savior with my neighbor’s watching me. I truly thought we’d be here for a long time. Now we’ve been led to a house in a new community that we are renovating. It will be our retirement home. As we begin to transition, I sense that a new call will be to have a Bible study for the women who work at church, in the community.
For the longest time, I did not feel I was serving unless it was done at church in an organized fashion. We have friends who have felt a call to minister to their Muslim neighbors. We’ve helped them help their neighbors. One year we did a mission outreach to the neighborhood. When I retired I helped watch the children while their mom’s learned English as a second language. When we moved to Virginia, these friends needed a time of rest. We loaned them our house, so they could physically be away from their work.
From them I have learned that reaching out is often a relationship building process. I t is not always a “you show up to a place” and touch people for an hour or a weekend. It is a process of living, loving and sharing life in the Lord that often will open people’s eyes to the Jesus we have come to know and love.
I am often amazed. Through the years as I have learned to “give” I’ve been given to more than I “gave.” I am constantly amazed at this. I’ve been to Nicaragua helping an orphanage build more buildings for the orphans. I mainly helped with getting food ready for the campers to eat. The young girls taught me how to fry food. To be honest I have hardly ever fried my food. I struggled with knowing when it was done. Those kids came in and loved on us as we worked, as we ate and that was a precious time. Each mission trip astounds me as we go to help, we find ourselves being given to as much as we give.
To me it is important to be a part of a church family. This family is there for you and you for them. I’ve cried with my church family, I rejoiced with them. The community of believers back when I was young was there for my family. They helped us get back on our feet after Dad had polio. They stood beside us, they laughed with us and they cried with us.
Do you have a community of people to rest in? Are there people for you to serve waiting for your hand of love?
May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.
Love
Janet
Friday, October 8, 2010
October 9, 2010
Greetings My Friend,
I am in the midst of my quiet time with the Lord doing a devotional journal and this lesson comes to me. It is one I have learned then have re-learned and here I am learning it yet again. Ever since I was a child I have wanted to find the right formula for living my life. I want life to be A+B=C. As I state often, I like to color inside the lines – it feels safe to me.
Walking with the Lord is not an A+B=C way of life either, bummer. Walking in faith is….just that walking in faith, not doing a formula. In order to walk in faith, I need to give my heart to God, accept Jesus’ death on the cross, confess my sins and then go out and “do.” This sounds kind of like a formula but it is not. As I walk in faith, I need to open my heart to listen to God’s will for my life. Reading the Bible, prayer, confession and doing are important so that my heart will begin to be open and “hear” God’s directions. I can only do this if I empty myself out completely and let the Holy Spirit fill me. I need to trust – hard for most of us to do in some form and I am no exception.
I find that my approach to life is different than a whole lot of people. I want to fit in and I struggle to fit in. I am different in many ways. In other ways, I’m not. I do have friends who love me the just the way I am and that is wonderful. For the longest time I thought I was stupid. I got a job at the bank and my employer did not know me. They saw talent in me. I was promoted from time to time. I chose to stay put after awhile. I chose to not climb way up on the corporate ladder. When my children were young, I wanted to be home more with them. When I married Junior, I wanted to be his wife, not an executive….not that I was executive material. I realized that climbing high on the corporate ladder meant giving up my personal life. I did not want to do that.
When Junior and I were first married he came to me one time. He was used to being considered the “odd” ball and was waiting for me to discover his odd nature. I did not know how others had treated him. I came to him as a clean slate and so had no preconceived ideas of who he should be. I told him that as well. If he kept coming to me then I would begin to “see” him as he had been seen by others. He quit worrying about it, we have been friends and sure he has moments that I struggle with but overall, I would rather be with him than anyone else in the world. He is the man I love, look up to and admire.
Of late, I keep getting hit with my “odd” ways of looking at life, doing life. I like to talk a lot. I am told that I talk too much. I like to write and then am told that my writing is useless to those I am trying to write to. I remember the past and that irritates some people. My doctor told me it was good for me to remember because she sees a lot of healing in me. She understands where I came from and for me it is important to not go back there. I do this by remembering, not hanging on to old hurts, holding grudges or shutting doors.
My formula ways don’t work either. The formula’s tend to mask the real problem and don’t allow the healing that needs to take place. I remember thinking if I didn’t let my kids eat white bread, regular peanut butter and drink a lot of pop, they would appreciate me. I also thought if I could figure out how to keep a spotless home, they would love me. My formulas didn’t work there either.
Kids grow up, form their own ideas and what I thought would endear them to me doesn’t always work. They eventually choose what they believe. Now I wish I had understood trying to rear them with a love of Jesus. This would have been a wonderful gift to give them, even if they rejected it. I believe they would eventually have come back to it in life. I did take my children to church, but to be honest, my faith journey took off when I was divorced. It was at a very low point in my life and I finally put it together in my head. When we are at our lowest is when we are often receptive to the real message of Jesus. Prior to that, I was trying to make God who I wanted Him to be.
More often than not now, I am able to open my heart to God, to allow Him to direct my steps. As I allow God to direct me, I find that my “odd” ways are ok. He loves me just as I am and then He also will change me as I grow in Him. If I look at Jesus’ life on earth, he was loved, then rejected and ultimately died a horrible death. The hope I have is that Jesus rose from the dead. At that point, I find how much God loves me, loves each of us. It is a wonderful feeling when you know you are loved, warts and all.
So I am odd, that’s ok. I talk a lot, that ok. It’s ok because God loves me. In this I am able to change to grow and to be comfortable in my own skin. As I allow these changes in my personality, I find life to be sweet, that I have a purpose, even if other people don’t understand.
May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.
Love
Janet
Greetings My Friend,
I am in the midst of my quiet time with the Lord doing a devotional journal and this lesson comes to me. It is one I have learned then have re-learned and here I am learning it yet again. Ever since I was a child I have wanted to find the right formula for living my life. I want life to be A+B=C. As I state often, I like to color inside the lines – it feels safe to me.
Walking with the Lord is not an A+B=C way of life either, bummer. Walking in faith is….just that walking in faith, not doing a formula. In order to walk in faith, I need to give my heart to God, accept Jesus’ death on the cross, confess my sins and then go out and “do.” This sounds kind of like a formula but it is not. As I walk in faith, I need to open my heart to listen to God’s will for my life. Reading the Bible, prayer, confession and doing are important so that my heart will begin to be open and “hear” God’s directions. I can only do this if I empty myself out completely and let the Holy Spirit fill me. I need to trust – hard for most of us to do in some form and I am no exception.
I find that my approach to life is different than a whole lot of people. I want to fit in and I struggle to fit in. I am different in many ways. In other ways, I’m not. I do have friends who love me the just the way I am and that is wonderful. For the longest time I thought I was stupid. I got a job at the bank and my employer did not know me. They saw talent in me. I was promoted from time to time. I chose to stay put after awhile. I chose to not climb way up on the corporate ladder. When my children were young, I wanted to be home more with them. When I married Junior, I wanted to be his wife, not an executive….not that I was executive material. I realized that climbing high on the corporate ladder meant giving up my personal life. I did not want to do that.
When Junior and I were first married he came to me one time. He was used to being considered the “odd” ball and was waiting for me to discover his odd nature. I did not know how others had treated him. I came to him as a clean slate and so had no preconceived ideas of who he should be. I told him that as well. If he kept coming to me then I would begin to “see” him as he had been seen by others. He quit worrying about it, we have been friends and sure he has moments that I struggle with but overall, I would rather be with him than anyone else in the world. He is the man I love, look up to and admire.
Of late, I keep getting hit with my “odd” ways of looking at life, doing life. I like to talk a lot. I am told that I talk too much. I like to write and then am told that my writing is useless to those I am trying to write to. I remember the past and that irritates some people. My doctor told me it was good for me to remember because she sees a lot of healing in me. She understands where I came from and for me it is important to not go back there. I do this by remembering, not hanging on to old hurts, holding grudges or shutting doors.
My formula ways don’t work either. The formula’s tend to mask the real problem and don’t allow the healing that needs to take place. I remember thinking if I didn’t let my kids eat white bread, regular peanut butter and drink a lot of pop, they would appreciate me. I also thought if I could figure out how to keep a spotless home, they would love me. My formulas didn’t work there either.
Kids grow up, form their own ideas and what I thought would endear them to me doesn’t always work. They eventually choose what they believe. Now I wish I had understood trying to rear them with a love of Jesus. This would have been a wonderful gift to give them, even if they rejected it. I believe they would eventually have come back to it in life. I did take my children to church, but to be honest, my faith journey took off when I was divorced. It was at a very low point in my life and I finally put it together in my head. When we are at our lowest is when we are often receptive to the real message of Jesus. Prior to that, I was trying to make God who I wanted Him to be.
More often than not now, I am able to open my heart to God, to allow Him to direct my steps. As I allow God to direct me, I find that my “odd” ways are ok. He loves me just as I am and then He also will change me as I grow in Him. If I look at Jesus’ life on earth, he was loved, then rejected and ultimately died a horrible death. The hope I have is that Jesus rose from the dead. At that point, I find how much God loves me, loves each of us. It is a wonderful feeling when you know you are loved, warts and all.
So I am odd, that’s ok. I talk a lot, that ok. It’s ok because God loves me. In this I am able to change to grow and to be comfortable in my own skin. As I allow these changes in my personality, I find life to be sweet, that I have a purpose, even if other people don’t understand.
May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.
Love
Janet
Friday, October 1, 2010
Oct 2, 2010
Greetings My Friend,
Junior and I were at a store recently. He was at the check-out and I walked up to him and put my items on the counter. I told the cashier that this cute man said he would pay for my things. The cashier laughed.
Junior and I love to play silly games. Our games are not about put downs to the other person. We have fun playing games. Out here in Virginia whenw e go away many times I will start off walking down the road and when Junior finishes, he will drive by and pick me up. I get my excercise in and to be honest I love being picked up by my man. I feel like a young girls once more, out for a walk, a honk from a man letting me know he thinks I am attractive feels real nice. He is safe.
For a few years we had stuffed animals on the bed. Ours were not the pretty type. They were rather homely, but we loved them. We had a giant frog and a rhino. As I went through cancer, I'd come hame and see the animals positioned in prayer. I'd ask Junior to tell me about what they were doing and he'd say "praying for you." Sometimes they were huddled close with a Bible, they were reading their Bible. Even A our granddaughter got into this act. She'd put Papa's sport coat on the frog with a neck tie. On the rhino would be a little bonnet. We always had fun with them.
When we eat out, we will sit side by side. We like that a whole lot. We did this when we dated and have kept it up. I just love our little games. They feel good and make me feel special to my man. I finally have the attention I longed for. It is precious to me.
These games help us stay committed. They also help us to not take life overly seriously. It is easy to get caught up in the serious things of life. The more we stay serious, the less hope we tend to feel. The games keep life light and airy, fun really. No oneelse may understand me like my husband does and when we take life lightly at times that helps us work through the hard times together.
Moving to Virginia was a rough time perioud for us. We loved each other, to be honest there were days though that we wondered what in the world we were doing. That ws a major move, a major change in our lives. We saw firsthand how differently we really were. For the most part our similarities were what drove us. The move brought out our differences in a big way.
Another rough period was when Junior retired. He retired before he was ready die tp jos back, so he struggled to find himself as a retired man. His personality underwent a few changes and at times I found the changes hard to deal with. Then of course there was my retirement and I was not the girlmy husband had married.
We are embarking on another change again. We have found a house and are renovating it for our older years. Much of the work will be hired out, some we will do ourselves. I have been prayer for a long time now. I am asking God to help us through this transition.
I heard one time the 1 in 1,0000 marriages end in divorce in couples that pray together. Junior and I are entering our 13 year of marriage. We started praying for our marriage on our honeymoon. I have to admit when we enter int some of our struggles, I find myself holdingmy breath so to speak. We have a failed marriage each behind us. I love this man so much that "us" not being together would devastate me. Then I remember the times where we struggled and survived.
Once again I learn to "see" when God has helped me in the past. This "seeing" helps me to be confident. I also learn to allow those "silly" moments to return. After each rough patch, we become friends. I believe our love is even stronger because we have worked through another struggle. We also learn to enjoy the peaceful times and we realize that the rough patches of life are always around the corner.
Once again I learn to "see" when God has helped me in the past. This "seeing" helpsme to be confident. I also learn to allow those "silly" moments to return. After each rough patch, we become friends. I believe our love is even stronger because we have worked through another struggle. We also learn to enjoy the peaceful times and we realize that the rough patches of life are always around the corner.
So as we embark on this transition I have confidence that we will come through it. We will be friends and we will enjoy our remaining years married, not "stuck" with each other. I remember "hearing" couples spout off the number of years they were married like it was a badge. The more you got to know them, the more your realized that they were in it till "death do them part." They did not like each other, they did not respect each other, but they did the time. I don't want that type of marriage either. I want us to be friends. I want us to be married for a life time.
So again, I am in prayer for this new journey we are on. I know that I know that in the end we will have a nice home, a comfortable home, a friendship and will enjoy our lives.
How important is marriage to you? Are you willing to pray for it? If you aren't married yet are you willing to pray for the man God wants for you? Are you willing to "wait upon the Lord?
May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.
Love
Janet
Greetings My Friend,
Junior and I were at a store recently. He was at the check-out and I walked up to him and put my items on the counter. I told the cashier that this cute man said he would pay for my things. The cashier laughed.
Junior and I love to play silly games. Our games are not about put downs to the other person. We have fun playing games. Out here in Virginia whenw e go away many times I will start off walking down the road and when Junior finishes, he will drive by and pick me up. I get my excercise in and to be honest I love being picked up by my man. I feel like a young girls once more, out for a walk, a honk from a man letting me know he thinks I am attractive feels real nice. He is safe.
For a few years we had stuffed animals on the bed. Ours were not the pretty type. They were rather homely, but we loved them. We had a giant frog and a rhino. As I went through cancer, I'd come hame and see the animals positioned in prayer. I'd ask Junior to tell me about what they were doing and he'd say "praying for you." Sometimes they were huddled close with a Bible, they were reading their Bible. Even A our granddaughter got into this act. She'd put Papa's sport coat on the frog with a neck tie. On the rhino would be a little bonnet. We always had fun with them.
When we eat out, we will sit side by side. We like that a whole lot. We did this when we dated and have kept it up. I just love our little games. They feel good and make me feel special to my man. I finally have the attention I longed for. It is precious to me.
These games help us stay committed. They also help us to not take life overly seriously. It is easy to get caught up in the serious things of life. The more we stay serious, the less hope we tend to feel. The games keep life light and airy, fun really. No oneelse may understand me like my husband does and when we take life lightly at times that helps us work through the hard times together.
Moving to Virginia was a rough time perioud for us. We loved each other, to be honest there were days though that we wondered what in the world we were doing. That ws a major move, a major change in our lives. We saw firsthand how differently we really were. For the most part our similarities were what drove us. The move brought out our differences in a big way.
Another rough period was when Junior retired. He retired before he was ready die tp jos back, so he struggled to find himself as a retired man. His personality underwent a few changes and at times I found the changes hard to deal with. Then of course there was my retirement and I was not the girlmy husband had married.
We are embarking on another change again. We have found a house and are renovating it for our older years. Much of the work will be hired out, some we will do ourselves. I have been prayer for a long time now. I am asking God to help us through this transition.
I heard one time the 1 in 1,0000 marriages end in divorce in couples that pray together. Junior and I are entering our 13 year of marriage. We started praying for our marriage on our honeymoon. I have to admit when we enter int some of our struggles, I find myself holdingmy breath so to speak. We have a failed marriage each behind us. I love this man so much that "us" not being together would devastate me. Then I remember the times where we struggled and survived.
Once again I learn to "see" when God has helped me in the past. This "seeing" helps me to be confident. I also learn to allow those "silly" moments to return. After each rough patch, we become friends. I believe our love is even stronger because we have worked through another struggle. We also learn to enjoy the peaceful times and we realize that the rough patches of life are always around the corner.
Once again I learn to "see" when God has helped me in the past. This "seeing" helpsme to be confident. I also learn to allow those "silly" moments to return. After each rough patch, we become friends. I believe our love is even stronger because we have worked through another struggle. We also learn to enjoy the peaceful times and we realize that the rough patches of life are always around the corner.
So as we embark on this transition I have confidence that we will come through it. We will be friends and we will enjoy our remaining years married, not "stuck" with each other. I remember "hearing" couples spout off the number of years they were married like it was a badge. The more you got to know them, the more your realized that they were in it till "death do them part." They did not like each other, they did not respect each other, but they did the time. I don't want that type of marriage either. I want us to be friends. I want us to be married for a life time.
So again, I am in prayer for this new journey we are on. I know that I know that in the end we will have a nice home, a comfortable home, a friendship and will enjoy our lives.
How important is marriage to you? Are you willing to pray for it? If you aren't married yet are you willing to pray for the man God wants for you? Are you willing to "wait upon the Lord?
May God bless you and keep you, make His face to shine upon you.
Love
Janet
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